Dream on || Blue lock x Reader

17. Distorted Heart

A/N: this chapter is kinda boring, I apologize for that. I wanted to convert mixed emotions, but I think I just went overboard and monologued a lot so sorry about that. Forgive me please, but I swear the next chapter will have more drama and romance.

You thought you were hearing things.

Ego's voice sent shivers down your spine. It was like a horror movie. You felt a cold sweat build up on the back of your neck, as you looked at the man in front of you. You wanted to deny, deny and deny everything. You didn't want it to be true, but in the end you couldn't run away from the reality of things.

Ego knew.

You were backed into a corner. This was so much worse than you could have possibly predicted. The man in front of you didn't just know the fact you were a fraud, he also knew your identity. It didn't matter now, he had you in the palm of his hands. Even if you ran away now, he would always be able to catch you. Because he knew who you were, he knew you were [Name].

Even though you knew you were caught, a small part of you still wanted to fight the truth because you knew if you gave up now then it was over. You still had to make an effort to convince him you were Loki, even if the chances of it working are slim. The best option was to pretend you didn't know what was going on. You just had to play dumb.

"Who's [Name]?"

Not that dumb! The words left your mouth without you even thinking! Oh god, now it was obvious you were lying! What kind of brother didn't know the name of his sister? You fucked up, you seriously fucked up. Every part of your brain was going on autopilot mode and you saw your life flash before your eyes.

The man across from you sighed, obviously disappointed at your response. You couldn't tell if he was annoyed because you lied, or because the lie you did tell him was repulsively idiotic. Honestly, you wouldn't hold it against him to be disappointed at both, truth be told you were also disappointed in yourself as well.

"Do you seriously take me for a moron?" Ego deadpanned. His tone was harsh and straight to the point, sending a shiver down your spine. At this point, you were just digging your own grave. Ego found no amusement in your last proclamation of ignorance, in fact it probably angered the man.

You brought your hands up in defense, violently shaking your head to deny his statement. Each second his stern gaze stayed on you, felt like an eternity. It felt like you were being crushed under a boulder, the weight of your lies and deceit had finally caught up to you. And now you just had to sprinkle a little cherry on top, didn't you?

"Of course I don't think that! I'm sorry, It just came out cause I was so nervous." You cried out. You struggled to get the words out, as your chest tightened in grief. You were so scared, so terrified. You could barely even stand at this point.

"I'm sorry, I'm seriously so sorry. Please forgive me. I didn't mean it, I didn't want this. Please... I know- I know I fucked up... I just- I didn't!..."

Jumbles of apologies and excuses left your mouth as you stood in the middle of the dark office. At this point, you weren't just apologizing to Ego. This was your apology to the world, to your friends for deceiving them, to your father and brother for failing them. It was your apology for not being enough, for never being enough. And in the end, when given the chance to finally make something yourself, you could even do that.

It was all pathetic, so pathetic that you could puke on the spot. No, you were so pathetic. You just kept muttering incoherent words as tears built up in your eyes. Even when you were about to be busted, you just had to act like a victim, didn't you?

You hated yourself.

The man looked you up and down, taking notice of small details like the slight shake in your legs, your rapid breathing and the sweat that had built up on your neck. You weren't lying, Ego concluded. All the signs pointed to you being on the verge of a panic attack.