Don't Tread On Me // Kirk Hammett

11. Where Did He Go?

April 29th, 1996

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Last night Kirk and I had been sitting outside together for almost an hour. Not a single word had been said, throughout the entire time we'd been out there.

I can't for the love of god figure out, why the hell he sat out there with me. His friends were all inside, talking, laughing, and drinking together. Yet for some reason he sat outside in silence,
smoking cigarettes with me of all people.

It just didn't make sense.

I hated him, he hated me.

After all the endless snotty comments, the poking, belittling, and death glares. He's suddenly just peaceful, and it doesn't make a single bit of sense to me.

I think back to the sweet guy I used to see on those interviews in the mid 80s, when I was a teenager. Part of me felt that last night, that boy had finally began to creep up out of the grave that Kirk had seemingly dug for his former self.

Although I should be appreciative that he's possibly trying to turn over a new leaf with me, I still can't help but wonder why now?

I also still also had that same question, that I once had the day I met him.

What happened to him?

I just didn't understand how someone could go from being seemingly so sweet, to the total asshole he was now. Maybe the whole innocent thing was an act, but it still didn't make sense to me.

It's not even my fucking business, but I just couldn't stop wondering.

The same question had been burning in my mind ever since I met him, and when James said he was "In a weird spot." It only added fuel to the fire.

So I did what any logical girl would do.

I decided to ask James!

I had gone over to James's house earlier, solely out of boredom. Plus James loves having me over.

We are sitting on his couch, drinking coffee and watching whatever the hell was on TV. I had zoned out a long time ago.

I couldn't hold it in anymore, my curiosity had gotten the best of me.

I turned to James, and lightly cleared my throat.

"James?" I questioned innocently, tilting my head.

He looked at me, raising his eyebrows in response.

"Can I ask you something?" I smiled innocently, in attempt to not look suspicious.

"About?" He asked curiosity, furrowing his brows at me.

I paused for a moment, before letting out a sharp breath.

"Kirk." I sighed.

James's eyes widened with slight shock for a moment, before a tiny smile crept onto his face.

"Ask away." He shrugged.

"What exactly... happened to him?" I questioned slowly, trying not to word it wrong.

"What do you mean?". He furrowed his brows again, only this time in comes confusion.

"I mean, I guess when I was a kid I always saw interviews of you guys on TV y'know? Kirk always seemed so sweet, so I was just wondering why he's a total ass now, unless he really has always been a dick." I explained questioningly.

James let out a heavy sigh, "No, he wasn't always a dick."

"What happened to him then?" I asked, my interest spiking slightly.

"After his divorce from Rebecca back in 90', Kirk just really never was the same. The kid loved too hard and got his ass kicked in the end for it, that on top of Cliffs death, he just fell into a bad place, got addicted to coke, and now here we are." James shrugged.

I just sat there for a moment, some guilt creeping onto me.

"So he really did go from being a total sweetheart, to one of metal's biggest assholes?"
I said slightly sarcastically, in attempt to lighten the atmosphere.

James cracked a small smile and shook his head, "Nah, he's definitely still in there. Kirk just puts on the asshole front now for whatever reason."

I nodded in response, trying to process this little bit of information.

A/N - Sorry for another short chapter! I really gotta stop writing these at 3am.