Yes! Mr Murphy

PART NINE: PILLOW TALK

LATER THAT NIGHT – CILLIAN'S POV

A few more hours had passed. It was 3 o'clock in the morning now and you must have spent at least two hours straight making love to each other.

You explored much more tonight than you did a few weeks ago when you had what was supposed to have been a one-night stand and this was exactly what made Cillian think about where this second encounter would lead.

At least for now though, Cillian knew that he should have just enjoyed the moment, but it was not as easy as he had thought. He was feeling guilty now and, while neither of you moved a muscle for a long time, the intrusive thoughts about his past kept creeping into the back of his mind just as he exhaled the last gasp of his orgasm.

It was his third orgasm that night and you laid atop him, head on his chest, arms around him, with your hips still straddling his. Then, at least for a few seconds, Cillian focused on the feeling of your breath pushing into him and slowed his own to match yours. You breathed in unison for a long time as he tried to make sense of how he felt for you.

He felt confused and possibly even more emotional than you.

After his recent separation from Danielle and numerous sessions of marriage counselling, he did not know that it was possible for him to feel so close to someone else already and this was exactly what worried him.

He liked you a lot and, to Cillian, your body felt like an extension of his own. Trust was a new well of entanglement he felt toward you, adding to gratitude, respect and awe.

He still did not know where this was going and he certainly was not ready to engage in a relationship just now, but he knew that there was no coming back from the place you were in at this very moment. Come what may, you were a part of him now after he did the unthinkable. He slept with his student. A woman much younger than him and, for some reason, it felt incredible and he did not regret a single thing,

There were no hard feelings as he watched you as you finally pushed your head up to look at him, chin resting on his chest. You wore a potent mix of satisfaction and melancholy on your face and this sent a smile across Cillian's face.

"Fuck that was intense. You are really good in bed, do you know that?" you then said after taking in a deep breath and when Cillian did not react to your statement, you paused and looked at him with concern.

"Please don't tell me that you are regretting this?" you asked with worry and, luckily for you, Cillian shook his head

"No. I don't regret this at all Y/N. I am just a little surprised by how good it feels to be with you. I honestly haven't felt like this in quite some time" Cillian then admitted without any reluctance whatsoever whereas, the truth was, that he never felt so uncomfortably close to anybody ever.

He was almost 46 years old, at the height of his career and not even his wife of twenty years made him feel the way you did right now.

"That's a good thing though, isn't it?" you asked without knowing that you had invaded the deepest parts of this man, causing him to be afraid that you were going to break him one day. He was still hurt from what happened with Danielle and he certainly did not want to get hurt again.

"It is, but I just need a minute Y/N. I will be right back" Cillian then said as, suddenly, he sat up, knowing deep down inside that he was not ready for what this may become.

You were his student and you were young, without children of your own and, yet, he was falling for you. It was not just sex that he wanted from you anymore even though he pretended this to be the case. It was a lie and this lie was a protection mechanism he needed to retain at least for now until the initial proceedings against Danielle were finalised.