Pavane for a Lost Boy (Or Rather, How to Survive Loss after Rejection)

Chapter Fourteen

"Demario, you are a hit!"

Those were the first words that left Derrick's mouth as Holly and I joined him for lunch in the spacious cafeteria during fifth period, all of the students (and a few teachers who were on lunch break) were giving me approving smiles, nods, and wide grins the moment I stepped inside. Sure enough, word about my concerto during break period soon spread like wildfire and I was definitely giving everyone something to talk about. "Well, it's all a bit unnerving," I admitted as I sat down next to Derrick before opening my carton of milk. "I was used to being in the background at my old school. I was grateful for that since I wasn't bullied, but I did feel alone."

"Didn't have much help in the friends department, huh?" commented Holly before biting into her sloppy joe sandwich.

"My older brothers- and maybe my mother- made sure that no one paid me any attention. Again, I wasn't bullied or anything since I had that at home, but I did wish for a friend."

"That's their loss, dude," commented Derrick as he popped a fry into his mouth. "You can find some good friends here. Just let yourself be who you can be and stay ture to myself."

I nodded. "I can try."

"Don't just try, Demario. Do it," came the voice of Mrs. Callaway as she came over to my table. "You were a wonderful sight to see as you played the piano earlier, so you're already on the right start. And I assume that you're still planning to audition for the chamber music band and jazz band?"

"Yes, ma'am," I replied.

"Excellent. Any other clubs that you might consider? Maybe a sport or two? Your old landlord told me that you did join the swim team at your old neighborhood's YMCA chapter."

I thought for a moment. "I guess that could work, but I mainly was on the diving team."

"I'm on the men's diving team," Derrick offered. "And Coach Phipps heard about you already, so he's willing to let you try out this week."

I put down my sandwich, my mind still reeling from all the attention. It felt so easy to just be left in the background and remain faceless in the crowd that I was tempted to say no and leave it at that. But as I looked around and saw everyone giving me encouraging grins and waving hello as they passed by; I knew that it was too late. Back then, I would've just refused and sulked in my mother's hateful stew.

But now she's dead. And though she continues to haunt my mind, I had to start living for myself. I took a deep breath. "Sure, why not?" I replied. "I'll try out."

"Great," Mrs. Callaway chirped. "I'll let Coach Phipps know that you'll try out later this week. And Demario, you're to meet with me, my husband, and your therapist after classes so you can give us a run-down on your first day here and talk about anything on your mind."

"Thanks," I replied. I could definitely use it since I was now in the spotlight.

You're not meant to be seen, boy, Mom's words sneered in the back of my mind. You're never going to be popular like your brothers. Everyone will use and abuse you and you'll soon be sorry that you never listened to me. Just kill yourself and save yourself the embarrassment.

Not today, Mom. Not today.

***********

After classes (And being given enough homework to keep me busy for most of the night) I was back in the principal's office with the Callaway duo, Dr. Nguyen, my foster dads, and even Gianna waiting for me. "How was your grand debut?" my therapist asked me eagerly as I sat down after exchanging hellos. "Judge McGillivray told me that you had a rather interesting day."