Trinity

The Burdens We Share

AN: When the Trinity is actively talking to one another while connected with Tsaheylu it'll be as follows. 

Miles: left aligned 

Ten: center aligned 

Mansk: right aligned

Every time she closed her eyes, Ten saw her brother's body lying on the craggy outcrop. When she opened her eyes instead, she was brought back to the scene of Lyle's unconscious body lying around the corner of the cave. Awake, asleep, eyes open, eyes closed. There was no reprieve from the consequences of their escape. So she lay in a hellish limbo made up of grief and loss.

Ten was physically, emotionally, and mentally fatigued. The constant reassurance from her mates helped keep her afloat, but... she wanted to slip back into anger. Anger was usually like a flame. If you fed it, it grew or stayed the same. If you covered it and deprived it of air, it would smother and smoke out. If you fanned it, fire could spread.

Fire was easy.

Anger was easy.

Pain was easy.

But grief... regret... remorse...

Nothing she did was ever enough.

It never felt like enough.

Why was nothing EVER enough?!

She could've gone back.

But she didn't.

She knew there was no saving him once he was lying motionlessly on that rock jutting out of the sea like a blade into her chest. Life drained from her brother like blood would flow from a wound. From his wound. Not with the scream. That scream meant he was gone. Still she hesitated, wasting valuable minutes not performing lifesaving measures on Lyle while debating whether or not she should bail from his banshee, call back Waryn, and go after her brother.

Those few minutes could have meant life or death for Lyle, and she wasted them on someone who was already dead. She might have thrown away his chance at survival.

When she was tossed the trauma kit, she made her choice. Not that she hadn't already chosen the Recombinants, but this secured it. The last remaining structure spanning the divide between her and her family finally gave way and fell into the depths below. She could see the betrayal in her parents' faces.

However, the betrayal was returned to them in kind. They betrayed her first. They left her and Spider behind. Abandoned them. They initiated that betrayal. Deserted them as they absconded with the family they actually wanted. Not the ones they were almost forced into taking in.

"I won't let you fall." Mansk whispered into her ear as he held her closer to him. She'd been lying against Miles' chest with Mansk behind her since she'd finally broken down into tears after the transfusion. Ten loved the way his hand splayed across her stomach, anchoring her to him as he shifted his chest closer against her back. "We will never leave you, Red."

Every time she started to slip into the darker parts of her mind, his voice was there to lead her back. She needed to be closer to her mates, in ways that weren't really possible with their current situation. There were hints of the same desperation within their bond. All three of them were feeling it. The claims were far too new for them to have not been with each other in days.