One Stupid Thing

1:6:21

We pull the HMS Pogue up to the dock at the Chateau a little before the sun began to set. Pope went home as soon as we tied it down. Today was crazy, but I couldn't help but feel a tinge of regret about going through with this plan. Not because I felt guilty for leaving Sarah there, but because now Sarah is apart of the Pogues. Now, I sit on the end of the dock, kicking my feet back and forth in the cool water and watching the sun set. I thought that the calm scenery would ease my worries, but unfortunately that isn't the case. I sigh and tuck a stray piece of hair behind my ear.

"You look lonely. Want some company?" I turn to see JJ standing behind me.

"Oh, hey, sure." I turn back around and stare out at the marsh. JJ sits down beside me.

"It's going to work, you know. With Kiara and Sarah. They'll figure it out," he says in an attempt to reassure me, but unfortunately that was what I was afraid of. I sigh and redirect my focus to my fidgeting hands.

"Yeah, I'm sure they will," I reply.

"You don't seem as happy as I thought you would be," he notices. "What's on your mind?" I feel his gaze burn into me but I'm too embarrassed to meet it.

"You won't understand," I reply, a little too snippy than I intended.

"Hey, try me," he replies, ignoring my tone.

I take a deep breath before beginning. "My whole life I have always been in Sarah's shadow. She has always been the perfect daughter, the perfect student, the perfect girl. Even my own father prefers her to me. I just...." I pause to take another breath. "I just, for once in my life, wanted something that she didn't. If everything goes according to plan, Sarah will be apart of this treasure hunt. I know it's selfish of me to say, but I wanted my own friends and my own adventures without her involved." When JJ doesn't immediately respond, I am afraid that I have said too much. My heart sinks at the thought that I have lost his respect.

"You aren't selfish," he says, not deterring his gaze. "I get it."

"But you don't, JJ. I've been compared to her since before I could walk. I will never be as pretty, or confident, or popular. I'm just Sarah Cameron's little sister." I rest my head in my hands and fight the tears from forming. That's when I feel JJ pry my hands away from my face.

"Are you kidding? Look at me," he says, but I'm so ashamed that I can't. So, he takes matters into his own hands. Literally. He places a hand on each side of my face and physically makes me look deep into his ocean blue eyes. "You are way more than that, okay? You are Stella Blair Cameron."

Staring deep into JJ's eyes, hearing him say my full name out loud, feeling his touch, makes me overcome with emotion. I search his gaze for any sort of doubt, but I can't sense any. He truly believes what he said. I feel gravitated towards JJ, like we are being pulled towards each other like a magnet. I can't deny my feelings any longer and the closer my lips are to his, the more I crave his kiss. My eyes begin to close and just as we are about to give into temptation a voice interrupts us.

"Stella! I'm back with your stuff I—" John B says. "Holy shit." JJ and I scramble to our feet, both flushed.

"Uh, o-okay! Coming!" I speed-walk up the dock and past John B without saying a word.

"Stella! Stella, wait!" John B scurries after me onto the porch. I stop and turn to face him.

"What?" I try to look nonchalant.

"Was I just about witness you and JJ kiss?" he says straightforward.

"I don't know what you're talking about," I respond.