Dreaming of You

Unseen Apologies (2)

— Amidst the bustling streets of Brooklyn, I sprinted with tears blurring my vision as my emotions ran wild inside me. The beating of my heart seemingly synchronising with the city's atmosphere as I bumped into and shoved my way past everyone walking down the streets of Brooklyn, each step of mine an attempt to escape the suffocating grip of my feelings. Once I arrive back at Vision Academy, I make a beeline back to my room, ignoring the various students that talked about me as I ran past them. As I sprint down the hallway and finally make it back to my dorm room, I slam my door shut, diving into my bed. Wetting my pillow with my tears as I try my best to stifle my crying and calm myself down. I know it wasn't his fault but it still pained me to know that he couldn't remember and that I couldn't just tell him.

— "Yoo Gwanda, how was your date?" I heard a voice call out from beside me as my door swung open. I look up from my pillow realising it was Peni."Oh...hey Peni." I reply weakly as I flop my face back down into my pillow to continue sobbing. "Yeesh clearly not good huh?" She jokes as she dumps her bag on the floor. "Shut up..." I retort as I twist my head to face her. "Come on lay it on me sister, what did he do? Did he try to kiss you or feel you up?" She joked while acting out a grabbing motion with her hand. "Eww no, gross!" I got up and replied while I tossed my damp pillow at her while a lighthearted chuckle escaped my lips. "Then what was it?" She asked concerningly, her voice taking on a more serious tone. "It's...It's just so frustrating that we can't tell him... I want him to remember me again. Remember US again." I agonised as I felt my tears well up again. "Don't worry Gwen, remember it'll take some time, he said so himself." Peni replied patting me on the head. "Yeh I know... still sucks though." I reply sniffing up my snot as she hands me a tissue box from our desk. "Thank you." I said with gratitude, blowing my nose, thankful she was there for me. "Want something warm to drink? It'll make you feel better~" She remarked as I laughed at her words. "Sure." I reply as she walked out the room, closing the door behind her. What would I do without her. Just as I thought this, my pocket started to vibrate. I pull out my phone and realise Miles had texted me.

— Hey Gwen you free to chat?

— I'm sorry.

— I read the texts through my lock screen and wasn't sure how to respond. I knew it wasn't his fault but I was just at a loss as to what to do. I stare at my phone for a while before impulsively deciding to just call him. The phone gets almost picked up instantly as I finally hear his voice. "Hey Gwen." He answered. "Hey Miles...no bestie?" I reply chuckling to tease him, wiping my nose as it continued to leak. It was nice to hear his voice again although it had started to remind me of the negative feelings I had. "Listen...I just wanted to apologise." He replied. "No..no.. I'm sorry for ruining the movie for you, I shouldn't have ca-" I try to apologise as he suddenly cuts me off. "No! You're wrong!" He yelled startling me, I had no idea he could raise his voice like that. "Don't say things like that! I-We were really happy when you joined us for the movie!" He blurted out, these comments making me feel warm on the inside, helping to quell some of the doubts that lay in my mind. "I just had to mess it up..." He said sorrowfully as I sat there in silence listening to him. Deep down I had wanted to tell him everything but I knew I just couldn't, at least not right now. We sat in silence for awhile until Miles started to speak again, "Gwen please be honest with me, have we met before?" Even more time was spent in silence as I fought myself internally, the weight of lying and not telling him was eating me up, I couldn't take this. "I-I'm sorry Miles but I need some time alone." I reply before hurriedly ending the call, I knew if I talked to him any longer I would end up spilling everything. I sat cross-legged on my bed staring at my phone as I noticed water droplets landing on my phone, only to realise it was my tears trickling down my face. I wiped my tears away again as Peni walked back into the room with 2 styro-foam cups in hand. "Here, I used the hot water dispenser outside." She said as she hands me one of the cups. "Thank you.." I reply as I take the cup from her, looking inside to see that the drink was green tea. "I had my own packs and I was gonna make some anyway." She commented trying to act aloof. I give the drink a blow to cool it down a little before taking a sip, feeling my fatigue from crying slowly melt away as the warm tea soothed my body. "So what's the plan now?" Peni asked. "I'm not sure. I need some time to think.. let me talk to Peter first."

...

— A week has passed since the incident and I've been actively avoiding Miles and his friends the whole time. I would arrive and leave class exactly on time, sitting far away from them to avoid conversations with them and would disappear during breaks. Sometimes Miles would call out to me but I would pretend to not hear him and run off, I couldn't bear to look at his reaction as I knew it would pain me even more to do so. Today I finally managed to get a hold of Peter as I stood outside his office door. The door was a regular wooden door with a plaque on the side with the words, "Mr. Peter B. - Ethics Teacher" written on it. I give the door a hard knock as a voice from the inside rings out, "Come in!" I swing the door open as I see Peter with his legs propped up on his desk eating pizza, his room was messy with papers and books stacked high on his desk, balancing precariously on one another looking like any slight shake might cause the tower to topple. He had a set of his clothes hung on one of the metal cabinets and various empty containers of food scattered about. "Oh shoot kiddo! What can I do you for?" He greeted happily as he wiped his hands down with a wet tissue, taking his legs off his desk. "Hey Peter." I reply sighing. "You know how hard it was to get time alone with you?" I comment annoyed at his relaxed demeanor. "Hey, duty calls. I'm a busy teacher and the kids keep wanting to chat with me." He replies nonchalantly as he motioned at the chair across his desk for me to sit. "Yeah yeah." I reply rolling my eyes as I walk over, dumping my bag on the floor. "I need help some with Miles." I confessed sighing. "Oh? In what way?" He replies raising his eyebrow smirking. "Memory way." I replied sternly as my face turns red at his reply. "Sure~..." He replied smirking at me. "It's just that I thought he would remember me immediately but he still doesn't remember and it's killing me to not tell him everything!" I answered frustratedly. "Gwen, I understand where you're coming from and I understand as an excellent role model-" He preached. "Only role model" I chimed in while rolling my eyes. "That you would come to me for advice." He continued ignoring me. "Thing is Gwen I really want him to remember too! But remember, these were the conditions set by him to agree to this arrangement, we have no choice but to do it this way." He reminded me. "But-!" I try and retort. "No buts, you agreed to this and said you could handle it." He replied, cutting me off. "I know..." I groaned, feeling powerless in the current situation. "Moving on, what's going on between you two besides that." He commented as he took a swig from his mug that sat on his desk. "What do you mean?" I questioned confused. "Kiddo I'm not blind. You two are unusually distant not to mention you keep leaving and entering my class on time, compared to day one when you two were practically inseparable." He answered causing my cheeks to flush red in embarrassment at his comment. "I-I don't know... it just hurts me every time he acts like his old self but doesn't remember me, I get reminded of the old times and I just- lose myself and get emotional." I revealed, annoyed at myself. "I get that Gwen and what you're feeling, but it's why we're here. And don't forget he's still the same guy we know and love, just... with a few memories missing. And he clearly still acts the same. So don't jeopardise making new memories with him by latching onto old ones." He assured as he got up from his seat to sit on his desk in front of me. "Do me a favor, and go talk to him alright? Knowing the kid he's probably distraught not being able to talk to you haha!" He commented chuckling as he gave me a pat on the back. "Alright, I'll try. Thanks Peter." I reply, thanking him for his help. "No problem kiddo. Anyway, you got another class soon and I have a pizza to finish. So begone young one! And close the door on the way out for me." He joked as he grabbed another slice to munch on. "Alright alright, see yah." I reply as he waves goodbye as I walk out the door shutting it behind me before leaning against it exhaling. Okay I'll try and work this out soon, maybe tomorrow or something. I need to prepare my heart first. I thought to myself as I walked off to class.

Thats chapter 12 woo! Told you guys the chapter would be soon =P, both chapters are on the shorter end because I planned for it be more or less exposition for this purpose. Hope you guys enjoyed!

Currently writing next chapter so stay tuned for that and again if you guys like the way the story is going or the way I write do let me know! Any feedback would be great as it'll help me improve my future chapters!

It's like 2am now so definitely time for me to sleep HAHA. So once again leaving you guys and gals here, Thank You so so much for reading my story and I hope you all have a wonderful day/night. Peace! <3