Whispers of Hope ✓

CHAPTER 25

ISHITA'S POV

"I'm so sorry Ishita."

I kept my silence as I didn't know how to react when he suddenly started to cry; his head down to my laps.

"I—for what?"

I say as I awkwardly patted the back of his head. I was so nervous of what I'm about to hear from him tho I already had the hint of what might be he is pertaining to. All these time, I tried so hard to hide my past from the world especially to Joshua as I am ever scared of what his reaction may be. Now that my heart and my mind got the certain peace and comfort around Joshua, I couldn't bear to imagine him walking and turning his back on me; no, I just can't.

"For everything."

He says and then looked up on me with tears falling straight from his eyes. For the second time since I met him, I saw his tears, his sad eyes overflowing with sorrow and I didn't know watching a man cry would hurt this much.

"I'm sorry that I had to ask someone else about you and not from you instead."

I was only left staring at him as my heart pounded more so I can imagine to beat.

"I'm sorry Ish. I'm so sorry that you had to experience everything. I'm so sorry that you had to go through that hell all alone. I'm sorry that we had to meet just now and not from then. I'm sorry that I couldn't do anything. Ish I—I just am so sorry."

His words pierced. It wasn't so hurtful of words but it penetrated my sentiments so hard that my tears began flowing without me noticing.

"No—Joshua, it's not your fault. Don't be sorry. I—it all has passed and I know I haven't gone through it yet but I know I can."

He was still looking up at me with so much remorse not the least bit content with my consoling words. It hurts to see him so devastated like this than the fact that he has already found out about my disastrous past.

"I can pass through everything Joshua."

I say as I gently wiped away his tears and holding the side of his face slowly.

"With you here now, I know I can prompt myself to overcome my past; you are the reason I am brave enough to do what I can't in the past now. So please, don't cry. Don't be sorry coz it's not your fault."

Joshua stared for more minutes and suddenly pulled me for a tight hug. His hold was tighter than expected and I felt myself being squeezed. I felt suffocated but I only gave back his gesture with my arms tightly wrapped around his waist.

.........

Morning came and as I opened my eyes, the radiant sunlight welcomed me so i then covered myself again. The cold morning breeze blew form the open balcony and so making it more cozy for me as I craved for more cuddles. I kept the pillows in touch as I hugged them tighter.

"Ouch Ish, you're suffocating me."

I didn't respond to what I just heard and resumed to cuddle more. and for a minute or two, I abruptly rose from the bed and looked around and to Joshua who is now looking at me with worried eyes.

"Why? Are you okay Ish? Something wrong?"

He says and puts his palm on my forehead seemingly feeling for any fever or what. I just gazed at him with wide eyes as I realized it wasn't a pillow I was cuddling with just now but Joshua himself. At the thought of it, I felt my wholeness getting hot especially my face so I stood and ran to the bathroom locking the door with a bang. I pulled my hair in mixed embarrassment and frustration as I saw how red my face was in the mirror.

"Don't hurt yourself there sweetie and come out later for breakfast. Don't be shy, it's all okay with me Ish."

Joshua teasingly say from the outside as I resumed to destroy my hair. I'm so embarrassed, why did I just hug him? I mean, tho it's nothing so intimate but it's my first time hugging a man and in the bed at that.