right where you left me

Chapter 57 - Hurting, Praying, Harming

We flew up to Brisbane to play in the game of a lifetime. If we won, we would be in the top four. We would make it to the final four. It was all we had ever dreamt of. It was a home World Cup, and I wanted nothing more than to prove to the world that Australia is a footballing nation.

"Are you okay?" Hayley asked me, as we boarded the flight.

"Yeah, I'm ok."

"Have you seen the headline?" she asked.

"No, I-" she passed me the paper.

JURY SET TO GIVE VERDICT FOR FINNIGAN JONES

"I don't think I want to read it."

"What do you think...?" Hayley asked.

"I have no idea."

"Do you think he'll go to prison?"

"Maybe."

"Do you want him to?"

"I don't know. He's my brother but- but I don't think I can ever look at him the same." Hayley looked at me, grabbing my hand. We sat beside each other, her giving me the window seat.

As we flew up the coast, the clouds covered the grounds. There was a distinct difference between here and there. I was up with the clouds, living on a high. Everything was perfect up here. Down there, not so much. There was a hell that transcended time and place.

When we got to Brisbane, I thought I would be able to find her. I thought I would be able to see her.

Except she had left. Leah had gone down with the England girls to Sydney. There was a distinct lack of communication between us two, and I knew I shouldn't read into it. We were busy.

But it was hard not to.

"I thought you were going to stay here?" I said, over the phone to Leah.

"I'm sorry, I just somehow ended up on the plane and-"

"It's okay."

"I promise you I'll be watching." I wanted her to be watching here. Was that selfish? Was I the problem here?

"I- it's okay." In my heart, it wasn't okay. But life couldn't always be what I wanted.

We were playing on Saturday against France. The stadium was going to be another sell-out, and the TV channels were expecting an incredibly high viewership. The pressure of a nation. They were all watching. It was now or never.

If we wanted to change something, now would be the time to do so.

Leah: good luck today

She texted me that morning. I smiled at the message before I was reminded what it meant. She wasn't here.

Tippah: i miss u

Leah: well, when u come down to sydney to play us... ill be there ;)

She was being optimistic. I loved her for it, or maybe inspite.

Sam wasn't going to start this game either and was going to come on early in the second half. This was her tournament. It was centered around her, and it hurt every single person's heart to know that she hadn't got to fully experience it.

We had a team meeting that morning, to discuss all things in relation to the game. Tony spoke to us, explaining France's tactics and how we would integrate our lineup and manage our team.

"Okay, penalty order..." Tony said. "Let's discuss." We soon figured out the order. We didn't want it to get that far, but we had to prepare for anything and everything.

"Good job today guys. All we need now is belief. You can do it. I know you can. Go out there and prove to the world and to yourselves that anything is possible." We all smiled at him before leaving. "Tippah? Do you mind staying back?" I halted my movement, before walking over to him.