here we are, again | billie eilish

6 | dont worry darling

a month later - lelilani's pov -

"do you have your toiletry bag?" i asked billie as we stood over her suitcases.

"yes," she nodded.

"and everything's in there?" i asked.

"yeah," she nodded.

"vitamins? razors? tooth brush? tongue scraper?"

"yup. yup. yup. yup."

i sighed. "okay."

"can't believe you didn't ask if i packed my skincare," she chuckled.

"oh i know you'd never forgot to pack that," i chuckled. "you'd have the whole plane turn around if that happened."

"i really would," she laughed in agreement.

"should we double check everything else?" i looked at her.

"lani we've double checked my luggage for the 4th time now.

"i know but you never know if you're forgetting somet-"

"lani," she cut me off.

i just sighed. "sorry."

she knew exactly what i was doing. i was just looking for an excuse to keep her here at the house because she's supposed to be leaving to board her flight soon.

and i'm not able to go to the airport with her because i have a mandatory doctors appointment for a checkup around the same time.

"alright guys," margie walked in our bedroom. "the truck is here. your family's coming in to grab your things."

"ugh i feel like your mom is mad at me," i rubbed my forehead.

"stop," billie chuckled. "she gets it. it's all good. i told you zoe's gonna take your spot so i won't be lonely."

"okay," i smiled. "i have to remember to thank her."

"hi guys," maggie smiled as she walked in.

we all spoke and greeted each other and started bringing all billie's things to the truck.

i was moving pretty slow tbh. basically dragging my feet and picking up only one thing at a time. my mood was just down.

i was bringing a bag to the trunk when finneas came up to me and said "hey, you got it?"

"huh?" i looked at him. "oh yeah i got it. it's not heavy."

"here let me just get it," he suggested as he grabbed the bag from me.

"thanks," i breathed.

i then started breathing heavier, noticing that it was now manual. i put my hand over my stomach and walked inside the home, hoping that no one would really notice.

i walked in and margie was carrying something out when she saw the look on my face.

"you okay?" she furrowed her eyebrows.

i just nodded and kept walking.

"lani," she squinted. "hey."

then i dropped to the floor.

"lani!" margie exclaimed as she dropped everything in her hands and ran to me. "lani what's wrong?" she kneeled down to me.

"i can't-" i began panting as i was now sitting on the floor. "i-"

"lani breathe."

"i can't do it," i managed to get out.

"do what lani?!" margie asked, concerned as ever. "billieeeee!" she yelled.