Alive (Phan)

TEN

The following weeks were beautifully normal. I walked to college every morning accompanied by my band of choice. I spent days with my friends, hanging out in the dorm between classes and anytime Di didn't have us booked for filming, which, admittedly, wasn't often. I ate lunch with Di, who drove us downtown for good food on Thursdays for the small price of kisses and groping. I was getting used to Di's desperate and forceful style of love-making, though the incessant talking was still aggravating. Fridays, though, were my favorite days. After our adventure in Heaton Park, I spent my free hour with Phil every Friday. We didn't leave the college anymore, but we did sneak into staff lounges to eavesdrop on lecturers or find hidden corners to hide away in and discuss music or gossip or the meaning of life.

It was three weeks before my routine was interrupted. On that particular Friday, I was later than usual to English, I got called on twice in the discussion and neither Phil nor Chris showed up to class. The drizzle which was curling my hair was a perfect representation of my mood as I trudged to the dormitory, hoping my friends would be there. When I got to the room, I found PJ alone, focused intensely at his laptop.

"Hey Peej," I dropped my backpack on Phil's bed, hoping my voice didn't sound too disappointed.

"Hey," he answered, distracted, "Do you know when your girlfriend is going to get me the footage from yesterday?"

"No idea," I said, "Sorry."

"I understand that it's technically her film or whatever, but if I'm editing it I don't understand why she needs to hoard all the footage," he sounded exasperated.

"How's that going?" I asked, not wanting to push him too much.

"Fine I guess," he said, although his voice did not sound fine. "I can't believe it's already October."

"Yeah, it's crazy."

"No, what's crazy is that I have two weeks to finish editing this eyesore and bloody Diana is won't keep her paws off of the footage!" He pushed his laptop aside and took a deep breath, running his hands through his thick, curly hair. "I just need a break," he said, collecting himself, "How was your Friday?"

"Fine," I lied, plopping down on Phil's bed across from Peej, "Um, where were Chris and Phil all day?" I asked.

"Chris had league football tryouts and Phil is at the university," he stated simply, closing his laptop and placing it on the floor.

"The University?" I probed, trying to sound casual.

"Yeah," PJ yawned, "Duh."

"Why would Phil be at the university?"

"Michael."

"Who?" I picked up one of Phil's mangas and flipped through it, desperate to seem nonchalant, though I could feel my cheeks flushing.

"Michael," PJ repeated, "He's a friend of Phil's."

"A friend?" I was desperately trying not to sound defensive, but I knew I was failing from the look in PJ's eyes.

"Yeah," he shrugged, "I mean, Chris and I have never met him. I don't think anyone has. We don't really know anything about him. Phil never talks about him other than every couple of weeks when he goes to see him. He's usually gone a few hours and then comes back like nothing happened. We all just kind of assumed that they—" PJ didn't have to finish for me to know what they assumed. It was obvious really.

Phil was sleeping with someone.

I couldn't deny that I was crushed as PJ continued.

"Phil's never been in a relationship, as far as we know anyway, but he has had a few... friends. People he visits. He never talks about them other than when he goes to see them and hates when we bring them up."