"Loss and rediscovery "| fyolai

8.My messiah

Thumps on the metal break the silence of the silent evening breeze, Fyodor was just about to leave with the infamous antidote, but Dazai and Chuuya emerge from the door, what would have happened? would he have lost? the jester turns and sees his friend bleeding, it was happening, his purpose, his goal was coming true, but was he happy about it? Was he really as satisfied and free as he thought he was? in that moment, in that precise moment, he realized the enormous mistake he had made, freedom was not killing Fyodor but the feelings he felt when he was at his side, when he made him feel special, praised, exactly praised, the one who it's never been, Fyodor made him feel like this, he didn't even have time to think that he saw the helicopter take off ".. is it over? .. no it can't" he said with a faint voice, a great light and feeble words spoken in Russian "eli eli lama, sabachthani?" sorry fyodor, this shouldn't have been my intention from the beginning he thought, a loud noise, a crash and dazai approached him "aren't you happy nikolaj? that was your intention from the beginning" as he took fyodor's arm from under the remains of the wreckage and hands it to the jester "yes I-..no it's not true..ansi you're right..no it's not like that" he said in response as he took his companion's arm and placed his hand on his eye who discovered as he sadly recounted his state of mind, he sat there, in front of the remains, in silence.Dazai and chuuya took the antidote... his excellent acting had worked, the silence was broken by a laughter "you fell for it! ahaha! you fell into the trap! it was all reversed from the beginning, in reality it's the 'antidote to being poison!' he laughs holding his stomach with amusement, drops of blood fell from dazai's eyes, nikolaj left him alone with chuuya like he did with fyodor, his plan had worked, fyodor would no longer be just a disciple but the messiah himself who brings him to salvation the freedom to feel, how he did that? simple, the flash was not an explosion but rather his ability, taking Fyodor to a safe place and only his limb remaining to deceive them, while he walks away giggling we can hear the pained screams of Dazai for the suffering and Chuuya who bids him farewell , he almost regretted sharing them, but it was his revenge served on a silver platter.
Where am I ? thought Fyodor, am I dead? no it doesn't seem like it to me he looks at the body looking at the missing limb, he smiled his god had not abandoned him, he had sent salvation, he had helped him, he stayed in that place for three days and at the end of them he saw someone very important to him, his savior, his messiah.
"FEDYA I'M SO HAPPY TO SEE YOU" Nikolai shouted and then warmly hugged his partner, who simply reciprocated slightly, now that they were in each other's arms they would never let go "I missed you too kolya" the other chuckled in response and in a joking tone said "come on, don't say that you make me blush" he tucked his hair behind his ear "by the way I have something for you" "what?" Fyodor asked and Nikolaj brought his companion's arm back to its place via the portal "Nikolaj" the latter turned around, it wasn't like him to call him by his full name "tell me" he asked "why did you save me, he let out a relaxed sigh accompanied by a smile" this situation made me understand many things, freedom would have been nothing without you, it would not have been freedom but an unbridgeable void, with you I feel freer than ever, you make me feel strong emotions that free me from the suffocating cage we are in, emotions that make my heart beat faster, fedya you are my freedom" she said taking off the paper once again and looking him in the eyes, with a smile on her lips, she approached him and looked at him intensely.