Miss Not Perfectly Fine

VMAs

i didn't feel like going on youtube to figure out the real orders of the awards and what taylor actually said so please pretend like this is accurate (i know it's not)

We were, as always, greeted by an unbelievable amount of flashing lights and screaming people as we pulled up to the entrance of the red carpet. I always wondered how they were able to figure out who was in which car — the windows are most always tinted.

"You ready?" Taylor looked at me as the car came to a stop. Tree had already climbed out of the car, ready to get down to business when we were.

"Yeah," I forced myself to nod and smile. Though I was not feeling ready at all and all I wanted to do was lay in my bed, I didn't want to slow Taylor down. I chose to come today even when Taylor gave me the choice to stay home. I couldn't back out now.

"Okay, let's go then," Taylor smiled and held out her hand for me to hold, which I gladly took. I was shaking a lot and I needed someone to hold onto while I worried about having a good expression on my face, having a good posture, making sure I pose right, and not tripping and falling in front of everyone and their cameras, all while dealing with the loud screams and bright flashes that come at you with demands. The stressfulness of the situation didn't help with my anxiety.

Once we were out of the car, fully exposed to the world, Tree led us over to where we were supposed to go for the red carpet. There were a few people in front of us, so we still had a few minutes before we had to go. I used this time to look around to try and find Miles. Fortunately, the person that made the seating chart seated us next to each other, so I was going to get to see him either way. However, it would be nice to have him to stand next to on the red carpet as well. I felt too bare when I was on the red carpet and being surrounded by people I knew helped with that.

"Do you know where Miles is?" I asked Tree and Taylor. They both looked around, seeing if they could spot him. They were taller than me so they were able to see more over people's heads.

"I don't see him," Taylor said. "Have you tried texting him?"

"Yeah but I don't think he's looking at his phone right now. He hasn't texted me back." I told her. I checked my phone again to see if I missed any notifications but there was nothing from Miles.

"I'll keep an eye out for him and ask around," Tree said. "I'll let you know when he's here." She smiled.

"Thanks Tree," I said and went back to staring straight ahead. I could only see the back of the security guard that was in front of us, but not being able to see the insane amount of cameras was probably for the better.

The two minutes we were in line felt like twenty minutes. I just wanted to walk the stupid carpet and go inside. It was getting cold outside and my feet were starting to hurt from the pair of heels that I was wearing.

"Okay, it's your turn," Tree turned to us after double checking with someone, probably the event staff, that we were good to go. I handed Tree my phone, which she put in her purse, and took a deep breath.

"You'll be okay, I promise," Taylor squeezed my hand tighter and smiled at me. "I'll be right there with you." I nodded and took a deep breath before stepping forward. Taylor started walking after I did, letting me go at my own pace.

As the camera people were snapping pictures of us and yelling at us to do certain poses, I heard a group of people cheering for someone. It was a loud cheer, the kind people gave Taylor. Curiosity took over me and I turned my head. Tree looked over to me and nodded, meaning Miles had just arrived.

"Do you wanna wait for him before we walk more?" Taylor bent down to my level and whispered in my ear. I nodded while still keeping my eye on the crowd that I assumed was forming around Miles.