Miss Not Perfectly Fine

Mastermind

I smiled when I saw that Miles had texted me back. I was hoping to wake up to something from him.

where should i meet you tmr

It wasn't until I read his text that I realized I had no idea what the plan was for tomorrow. I brushed my teeth and made my way over to Taylor's room to see if she was awake.

She wasn't in her room; unfortunately, she was currently plating our breakfast in the kitchen. I sighed and internally punched myself for not sleeping in longer.

"Good morning Sky," She turned around when she heard me walking into the kitchen.

"Morning. What's the plan for tomorrow? Miles wants to know." I got straight to the point.

"I was thinking Miles can meet us here at 9 and we'll drive over to the airport together and fly to Kansas City on my jet, and then head to the stadium when we land?" She paused to see if I was on board with the plan.

"That sounds good. I'll let him know." I sat down on the stool by the counter and texted Miles the plan. He reacted to my message not long after with a thumbs up emoji.

"What should I wear tomorrow? I don't have any Chiefs merch." I sighed and looked at Taylor. "What are you wearing?"

"I'm wearing a Chiefs jacket that Travis got me. He got you a long sleeve shirt that you can wear but you don't have to if you don't want to." Taylor said.

"Can I see? Was it cute?" I was a little worried if I was being honest, because in the past, the clothes that I was gifted from my sister's boyfriends have not been what I call cute. They weren't awful, but I've worn them maybe once or twice at most and only in front of them.

"I thought it was cute," Taylor shrugged and chuckled, understanding where my concern was coming from. She also thought that the clothes I had received weren't the best choices for me. "You can see for yourself and try it on but eat breakfast first." She placed the nicely plated pancakes in front of me before sitting down next to me with her own plate.

I sighed at the sight of my two pancakes topped with some fruits and butter. Not only was I not hungry at the moment, I also couldn't help but think about how fat I already was and how little this would do to help the situation. In fact, it would make me gain more weight and lead to more self hatred and guilt.

I knew Taylor was watching me though, and I wanted to be free of the constant supervision during and after meal times, so I sucked it up and started eating. Taylor's pancakes were always so delicious and I used to have seconds, sometimes thirds of them. I often wonder how I used to eat everything without thinking about calories and feeling bad about it afterwards. I couldn't remember what it was like to feel joy and satisfaction when I ate.

Once I was finished with half of what was on my plate, I set my fork and knife down and pushed the plate away from me.

"You're halfway done. You're almost there." Taylor pushed the plate back towards me after a couple of minutes when she saw that I had no intentions of eating any more.

"I'm so full," I groaned.

"Are you really full or are you trying to get away with eating as little as possible?" Taylor raised her brows.

"I'm really full!" I defended myself. She didn't say anything for a few seconds, probably giving me time to either tell the truth or explain myself more, but I didn't do either of those things. Instead, I just sat there staring at the fridge that was across the room from me.

"I think there's a part of you that's still worrying about calories and the possible weight you might gain from this and all the ways you can either not eat or burn it off later, hm?" Taylor spoke my plans out loud, making it evident that she saw right through me.