NONKULULEKO

24

NONKULULEKO
#24

I was released from the hospital after my wounds and bruises healed. And per Kay's words, I was arrested immediately. I was awaiting my trial, but I just knew I would get a life sentence. I have hurt so many people, and k*lled even my family members. They were right, when they said I am a danger to society. I am willing to go to prison and get help for my illness. I know that it cannot be cured, but maybe the medication will help subside it. I don't want to live like a crazy woman, for the rest of my life.

I have spent a month in prison, and it isn't nice at all. I never get any visitors, not that I expect anyone to visit me though, I have managed to turn everyone against me. Even Vuyo doesn't want anything to do with me, I hope she is okay wherever she is. And that her parents didn't take her back to that place, she is just a child.

I am sitting on the bed, dangling my feet over the floor. A guard comes through and opens the gate. She comes to me and handcuffs my hands and cuffs my ankles. 'Danger to society' , remember?
"You have a visitor"
Me? A visitor? Who could it be?I was too anxious and I couldn’t wait to see who it was.
She led me to the visitor's area, and my heart shattered when I saw who my visitor was.
Gogo! She is wearing a sling over her shoulder.
I am ashamed, I am the one who caused that.
I sat down, with my heart pounding from fear and embarrassment.
"No touching. You have 25 minutes," the guard instructed. She stepped back to give us space.

"How are you doing?" She tried to touch my hand, but remembered the ' no touching ' rule.
"Coping," it was the truth. I am coping.
"I'm sorry," what is she sorry for? I should be the one apologizing.
"I should have been a better guardian. I'm sorry Nonkululeko. I hope you forgive me,"
"I'm the one who hurt you Gogo, I should be apologizing"
"No no, we pushed you into it. We caused this illness you have. I have to take accountability. I shouldn't have punished you for your mother's sins."
"Gogo…"
"Your father wanted to apologize, but he was too ashamed. He died without clearing things between the two of you. I don't want to do the same. I want you to know that you have my support, I will be there on your trial day, hoping for the judge to have mercy on you"
Only if she knew.
"They have strong evidence against me, Gogo. I am going to jail."
I tapped my fingers on the desk slowly.

"I have been seeing a therapist for the past week. I had time to reflect on my life choices. Doing what I did, I always covered it up with avenging myself, and that the people who abused me pushed me to do it. My math teacher did nothing wrong, she just wanted to help, but I killed her. I just….I am realizing the way I went about the whole thing. Also, how we as black people, we are not educated enough when it comes to mental disorders. 'Crazy' is always loosely used in situations like this. I am not going to sit here and ask for forgiveness, because what I did was unforgivable. You are older than me, I shouldn't have laid my hand on you. I should have taken the matter to the police, and let the law run its course."

I wipe my tears and continue talking," I have lied so much Gogo, to a point that I don't even know if I still have the chance to be helped. I don't even know which is which, my mind and emotions are not stable. My mental health is all over the place. Please do not blame yourself for what is happening. You changed your ways and felt sorry, you apologized and I forgave you. All what I was doing was to feed my own ego and fuel this ASPD. I'm sorry for everything."

She cried and touched my hands, her hands were so warm and full of love.
"I said no touching! Time is up"
She grabbed me up, and took me back to the cell.
*
*
Two weeks later, the trial has dragged on for too long and my chances of being convicted are increasing daily. Today was the day of the final verdict. The trial was exactly as I thought it would be, all evidence pointed to me, and I pleaded guilty. Because I really did commit those crimes.

True to her words, gogo did come everyday, even when she was called on the stand. She found a way to defend me and speak for me.
I am nervous about what the judge will say, I don't know what the final  decision will be. I am nerve wrecking.
I am wearing orange overalls, with cuffs on my wrists and ankles. I'm standing on the box, awaiting my fate.

The judge comes in and all rises. He starts immediately. My heart sinks as he goes over the details. I am found guilty on four counts of murder, and one attempted murder. My eyes scan for Gogo, and she is crying silently, consistently wiping her tears with her doek.
"The accused spent three years in a psych hospital, but no evidence shows that she was helped with her illness. Therefore, the accused is given two life sentences in solitary confinement. With the opportunity to be given medical help two times a week. Court adjourned. You will be allowed visitors once a month"
He hit his hammer and stood up. The audience went wild in court, happy with the verdict. Only Gogo and Kay were on my side.

As for me, I was numb. I expected it. I knew this is what it would come to. I am not at all surprised. Gogo ran to me and tried to hug me, but they pushed her away.
"I will always remember you, I will visit you everyday," She proclaimed as she tried to get to me.
I was taken away, waiting to be transported to that solitary place they were speaking of.
"Transport will be here in an hour."

I waited for that hour, and five guards came to escort  me to the van. The crowd was buzzing outside, and the media. I would be headlining by evening no doubts. I was shoved into the van and  I saw a man I recognized.  It's Vuyo's father. What is he doing here? He stood by the door of the van and touched my legs.
"I'm sorry."
I am so confused!
"Sir please step away, this van is leaving and transporting the prisoner"
They pushed him away, but he fought and kept on looking at me.
"This is my daughter, I need to bid her farewell. She's my daughter"
.
.
THE END

Thank you for reading and engaging. It was an honor to write about something different, in a different style. I never thought I could ever write about one character throughout the story but I managed. Till we meet again.
God bless.