My Professors

Reassurance

I bite my thumb in nervousness. I shift my gaze from the Professor in front of me to the clock.

It's not that serious. All I have to do is apologize.

Ever since I stormed out of the classroom all I've felt was guilt for leaving and not even having the decency to thank them.

I sigh laying my head down.

"That's all we have for today, make sure to turn in your work for the next class."

Without skipping a beat the bell rings.

I lift my head up. I look over to see students walking out of the classroom. 

I grab my things, shoving them in my backpack. I push in my chair and quickly walk out the door.

...

I grab the handle and walk into the building. As I walk, I see some classes are still in session and others are empty.

Right as I turn the corner my heart begins to pick up the pace.

All I have to do is apologize and leave. That's it. 

As I near his class I see the door is slightly ajar.

I stop a little behind the wall and peek my head through the door.

I look over at Professor Ford standing by his desk, stacking papers together. 

I sigh before I bring my hand up to knock on the door. 

Professor Ford whips his head over in my direction. His eyes met mine.

"D-do you have a m-moment?" A small nervous smile forms on my lips. 

In response, he nods his head gesturing his hand to the chair across from his. "Come in."

I walk in, closing the door behind me. I walk over to the chair and place my backpack on the floor.

I then take a seat. The sound of a chair scraping against the floor grabs my attention.

I look up to see Professor Ford taking a seat in front of me.

I look away. I kind of wish he would have busied himself with work. 

The feeling of his gaze on me made me feel...naked?  Which I disliked.

I swallow, ignoring the heat creeping up on my neck. 

"What did you have to say to me, Ms. Jones?"

I keep my gaze on my lap. 

"W-well, I wanted to apologize for last night," I say.

I pull my gaze up to find his eyebrows furrowed in confusion. 

"Last n-night when I asked you about... Adam. I had l-left quickly without saying thank you. It-It was just that I was c-confused and I didn't really know w-what to say. But I should h-have said thank you. Without the help of you three, I r-really don't know what w-would have happened."

I pause looking down at my lap.

 My heart started to feel heavy. I could feel all those feelings that I've repressed begin to resurface from that night.

I dig my nail into my skin, trying to alleviate the weight on my chest.

Why am I starting to feel like this now?

I was perfectly fine up until now.

I gulp before I continue.

"So p-please know that I am truly g-grateful. I p-promise to repay you one day."