Nova Academy

Egg Behavior

"Don't have sex." Zir Guildmanns tone was as engaged as the students, completely exhausted. His eyes drooped like he'd never so much as seen a bed and his arms hung limply at his sides. He was a chubby, brown haired man with a dead soul. He did even have to open his mouth to make you feel bad for him. Or just bad in general.

They all stopped talking and waited for the 'unless' but it never comes. It never does.

He was technically a new teacher, subbed in two years ago and never got to leave. The other teacher had vanished, and no one heard from them again. The sillier ones thought the ghost of Ms. Willis walked the halls at night and left scratches on the lockers. Every once in awhile someone will find a new, deep scratch on their locker exposing the silver metal underneath and they all whisper, "Ms. Willis is back."

Connie was pretty certain it's Jacob, who uncharacteristically kept quiet about the whole thing but she can never be sure.

"Don't have sex, or you will get an STI or an STD and die."

Connie raised her hand but he ignored it. Like always.

That wasn't a factual statement, and she intended to tell him that but Jolene caught  her eye and shook her head discreetly. She hadn't had him last semester, but apparently he was fragile. He told them something along these lines every day. Yesterday it was "don't kiss each other." and the day before "don't share utensils or straws". Then he shows them pictures of the abominations that can happen if you do.

Every class it got worse.

"I know you won't listen to me," He said miserably. He sighed and grabbed a box from under his desk, "Everyone take a condom."

"Zir Guildmann, we have... so many condoms." Alex pressed his fingers to the bridge of his nose. "What are we supposed to do with them all if we aren't encouraged to have sex?"

He didn't seem to hear him at all and shook the box. "Grab one, grab a handful, I don't care. Just take them."

And because he's so pathetic, they can't help but take one as he walks by.

"Have you ever heard of Syphilis?"

They all nodded frantically, trying to deter him from showing them yet another traumatic slideshow of symptoms and sores and rashes.

But he hit the button and they all groaned and itched at their skin, all revolted and some swearing to never have sex again.

After that, he zoned out and it was basically a free period. Connie hated free periods.

Steven, attempting to avoid continuing to watch murmured behind her. "I don't even know if I can get STD's and this still makes me want to cut my own dick off."

"Let's just do it like a group suicide. Just stand in a circle and do it." Jacob looked down at his pants sadly. "We had good times, but I can't take this anymore. It's not you, it's me. I'm not ready for commitment."

They forced a laugh but it fell flat as a particularly grotesque picture made them all gag.

"How is this allowed?" Adam asked, seemingly unbothered except for the fact his legs were pressed tightly together. "Doesn't he have to teach us in further detail?"

Connie shrugged. "It's a scared straight tactic. They do it for juvie to little kids sometimes too."

"That's cruel and unusual!" Steven protested. "Why?"

"It's so we're careful. You can't just go around screwing people willy nilly. You get test results, or you use protection." She patiently explained.

"Condoms suck." Hazel rested his head on his hands. "They never have my size."