𝖋𝖔𝖗𝖊𝖛𝖊𝖗 𝖞𝖔𝖚𝖗𝖘, 𝖓𝖔𝖈𝖙𝖚𝖗𝖓𝖆𝖑 𝖒𝖊 || ɢʜᴏꜱᴛ ʙᴄ

𝐢 𝐚𝐦 𝐜𝐚𝐮𝐠𝐡𝐭, 𝐭𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐥𝐞𝐝 𝐢𝐧 || 𝐜𝐢𝐫𝐫𝐮𝐬 𝐱 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫

cirrus x multi-ghoulette reader

requested by peegoblin  (im sorry ur name is fucking killing me i couldn't proofread this without laughing for like a minute straight 💀)

mostly angsty and not very smutty cause i just could write it im sorry 😭😭😭😭😭(but i got pretty close dw its not pure angst)

barely any use of y/n

1670 words

 A fuckup. That's what she was. An assortment of every element. A complete nuisance. How could she be useful if she can't use any of the elements properly within her. None of them come to the surface whenever she tries and it fucking hurts. It hurts seeing Swiss be able to use quintessence to help with Aurora's headache while Phantom is out. It hurts seeing Sunshine use fire to help Dew with the candles. It hurts seeing all the other multi-ghouls live their lives and use their elements without issue.

If they can, why can't I?

She doesn't fit in here. She doesn't fit in with all the other ghouls and ghoulettes with complete control over her element. She doesn't belong in the common room when they all show off their powers. She looks out of place when all the ghouls gather for mass. It doesn't help when some of the Siblings spread the rumor that she was a fake. A poser. A human wearing a costume. Maybe it was because her tail was too long, or her horns were shinier than normal. Maybe it was her too long fangs, or the charring of her fingertips that looked almost suspiciously too much like makeup. Maybe it was the fact that she did look like a poser in a too-well put together costume.

Why can't I look like them.

Did something go wrong during her summoning? Was she really just a human? Did the clergy somehow convince her into thinking she was a ghoul. One capable of being extremely powerful if she was just able to get a grasp on the elements harbored in her body. All these thoughts ran through her head at all times. It weighed down on her, pulling her further and further below the surface. These thoughts haunted her in her dreams. It was never ending. That was, until, she showed up.

She was instantly enamored by her flawless appearance. The way her thick hair hung down her back. The way small wispy clouds hung around her perfectly curled, almost crystal like horns. The way her smile was so intoxicating that everyone instantly felt their bad moods disappear. All these thoughts and feelings took over her brain, clawing through the negativity to bring some sort of happiness into her life.

She didn't even know her name until it was dropped in a conversation she had been listening in on unintentionally. Cirrus. Satanas, it fit her. It plagued her for weeks. The clawing feeling in the back of her brain that this ghoulette that she just so happened to see one day had to be just the thing she needed to get pulled out from the miserable self wallowing she had been stuck in since her summoning.

Everyday it was her mission to at least get a glimpse of the girl who plagued her mind these days. A small glance from across the room. Watching a recording of her keytar solo. Making eye contact in a cafeteria. Anything would be better than the thoughts she had pushed to the back of her mind.

Everything was right whenever Cirrus was around. Everything felt whole again. It's like everything in her depressing little life had just clicked. She had to talk to this girl. Even if it was just once. Even if they never talked again. Even if it was just one word. She was desperate.

She saw her in the library one day, putting the books back on the shelves. It was quiet, with barely any people around. It was perfect for her to finally get the chance to meet the girl who made her feel less insignificant. Less of a failure.