Part 15: Pocket Change

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11/20/2023 6:54 pm
Rose

Why does he want a rose when I am a lilac
He's looking for thorns when I'm cutting myself free
He's looking for petals that he can arrange
I'm looking for water on a nice sunny day
He's looking for the smell of spring beginning to bloom
Whilst I smell of winter
Nip at your nose
If you are not carful
I will let you go
I'll freeze over
Leave you in My wake
searching endlessly for my own sake
That someone's first choice will not be a rose
That I will be someone's first choice
The lilac budding to grow.
That for once in my life he'll choose a lilac
Over a rose
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Poison

Your a cow boy like me
Bonnie and Clyde
A veteran saying by to his wife
A classy good
A messy bad
All dressed up in their silk and hats.
So.. um.
Well I was just daydreaming
Um..so.
Well I had just kept thinking
And I can't live in the moment

I can teach you

This is a bad decision

I believe you
Then why are we
So vibrant together.
Bad idea
You and I
Leaving all the past behind
Taping to a different beat
I feel that I have two left feet cleats
Dug into the turf
Fake grass will always hurt
skirt
Tights and a coat
nope change doesn't go
Why put in the effort.
Cause that's who I am
He can be casual he's a man
Respectful and kind
Flirtatious and fine
Rebellious and low life and street rat and I
don't quite buy that
Jasmine
save me from his poison
Before we fall down to the ocean
Heartache cyanide dissolve all my fears in the blink of an eye
My breathing has quickened
Your eyes are so wide
Filled with sarcasm, confidence and pride.
Have it all figured out.
And not quite at all.
I think you're steady on your feat
I still worry I may fall.
Honing my skills under my quills that will, wills into existence a new bill to fulfill
Compare the Reference until
Anytime I check the watch a warning alarm goes off
Don't fall too deep
There was no splash
Drowned in the poison
Of a friendship last.
—————————————————————————
11/26/1:31pm 2023
Change

An iced over River
Flowing overtop
Rapids and exits
Windows looking on
I wonder if anyone's ever used an emergency buss exit

Jumped out the window
Broken a case
Holding a fire extinguisher

Guess it just goes to show
The tenacity of human grit
under pressure
Pressure
Why does it take the pressure and compression of time,
of life,
of reality to let someone step into thier light
I wonder what would happen if the world wasn't ending
If monotony existed with highlighters scribbling on a grey page.
If one simply decided to
Do
what they say
rather than leaving
another feeling
enraged
at the place where it started
A hole in the wall
Punched by my emotions
Nothing but a missed call
Call in a rain check
"Don't hate me please"
If I had a nickel I think I'd be rich
Every cancelation
Every miscommunication
Last minute evacuation
Not that I care
I went in with that
Expectation
Thanksgiving promises are lost in the
Wants
the needs of
those greeds that
wanted a fun chase but when it came down to the wire never wanted me
So I'm left
With pocket change
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