doppelgänger

twenty-three💛

( present day )

Throw out all of Soojin's warnings about not cursing in front of Soyeon because it 'might trigger her' or something, Yuqi was angry. And she couldn't hold it in anymore. She honestly didn't know how she survived that entire car ride. "Tell me why in the actual fuck did you press that?!"

Soyeon flinched back.

"Why??" Yuqi pressed her up against the wall in the small space. "Why after cheating on me do you expect me to welcome you back with open arms? I fucking love you so much Soyeon, and you can't even give me any time to myself to think about the things you've done to me?!" Yuqi wants to hit her. She wants to. But she doesn't, that would be wrong. That would mean she's like... like the girl in Soyeon's head. "Why did you cheat on me? I thought you loved me too. Did every night that I spent together with you wither away once you met her?"

Yuqi felt something wet staining her cheeks. She didn't care. "Why did you do it?"

Soyeon pushed Yuqi away from her forcefully, the younger falling backwards and slipping on the floor. She hit her head against the elevator's wall, causing a loud bang to sound. "I didn't trap us in here so that you could yell at me," Soyeon says angrily, not even feeling bad when Yuqi rubbed the back of her head in pain.

She didn't even want to get up, so she stayed on the dirty floor of the lift. "What did you even expect me to do?"

Soyeon wrapped her arms around herself self-consciously. "I don't know, forgive me?"

Yuqi scoffs. "You think I'm going to forgive you when that image of you kissing her is still running through my head? And just– Soyeon look at yourself!" Her face twisted in anger at the sight of the disgusting marks. She could treat Soyeon so much better. "Do you know how much I've wanted to have a special night with you like that? And she won over your trust enough to do that in what– the week that you've known her?"

"It's been more than a week," Soyeon grumbles.

"I don't give a shit how much time it's been because I know whatever it is, it's less time than we've had!" Yuqi's fists balled up in anger. "What the fucking hell does she have that I don't?!"

Soyeon's eyes focus on the floor, she's quiet.

"Say something!" Yuqi shouted, "You wanted us to talk so badly! The more you stand here with your damn mouth shut, the more pissed off I get. So you better speak before I go back to not talking to you either."

"I just wanted to try something new, I'm sorry. I don't know what I was doing. I was stupid, I'm sorry. I'm sorry," Soyeon cries, leaning against the wall, hitting herself on the head with her hands, practically beating herself up because if she doesn't.. then won't someone else? It feels like the whole world is angry with her, like she's committed the worst sin. She's going to hell, she knows it, the way Yuqi yelled at her means she did something worse than the worst. "I'm sorry," she says again, dropping down onto the floor next to her, trying to ram her body against the wall.

"Soyeon, stop it!"

She didn't stop. She didn't want to stop until she passed out, she didn't want to hear this anymore, she couldn't. Maybe if she keeps hitting herself, then just maybe Yuqi won't be mad anymore. Maybe Yuqi will be happy to see Soyeon suffering the same way she'd suffered.

Stupid me, stupid Jihyo, stupid, stupid..

Yuqi put her hands against Soyeon's shoulders, gripping her tight and setting her into place. "Stop hurting yourself!" Yuqi yells to her, looking her right in the eyes, "You won't fix anything by hurting yourself, so stop it!!"