Deep and Abiding [JoongDunk]

Chapter 10 : Forgotten Brother

[Phuwin]

"Pond."

"Hmm?"

"If you were Joong right now, what would you feel?" Phuwin looks at Pond who is sitting beside him at the dining table, waiting for Joong and Dunk to join them for dinner. Pond looks up from his phone and gives his full attention to his omega.

"You want to understand Joong?"

It's not like he wants to understand Joong. But it's more like he wants to understand alpha in general. He saw how Joong's eyes changed when he heard that Pond can smell Joong's omega now and sure thing he never saw that side of Joong Archen. He looked so mad and Phuwin didn't understand the reason why.

Why would he be mad at something he can't control?

"If you were the only one who could smell my pheromone and one day you lost that ability to be the only one who could do that? Are you going mad too?"

Pond looks at his eyes for a while as if searching for something there, seems like he found it because he smiles. "Yes."

Phuwin frowns. "Why? You can't control something like that?"

"Phu, if you see me too close with another omegas, what do you feel?" Phuwin doesn't understand why Pond is answering his question with another question. But he tries to be patient and answer the question.

"Depends. If you are too close and have unnecessary intimate physical contact with another omegas, I'm so gonna be mad at you." For real, why would his alpha do that?

"Ok, but what if I only sit side by side with an omega in the class. What do you feel?" Phuwin doesn't understand why Pond keeps giving him questions.

"It's normal, isn't it? I should feel normal about it."

Pond smiles and touches Phuwin's hand. He holds the hand and cares for it softly. "But we can't, Phu. We can't feel normal whenever we see our omega closes with another alpha."

"Huh?"

"The thing about alpha is, whenever we fall into an omega, our world is revolving around them. Our omega become our center of the world, everything that they do and feel is so important to us. We want to keep our omega from danger, so our protective demeanor comes out naturally. As our love grows deeper and deeper, our obsession is growing in that same direction as our loves. We have this sickly obsession with our omega and even though it's not good, we can't control it. That obsession easily turns into possessiveness."

Phuwin tries to understand Pond's explanation and he still isn't sure if he can understand an alpha's feelings.

"We want to be with our omega, we want to always see them, touch them, talk to them. We want them to be for only ourselves. Our basic instinct can tell us to just lock our omega in our territory so other alpha can't see, talk, or touch them. That's the deepness of our possessiveness."

That's scary to be honest. If one day Pond tries to lock him up in the apartment so Phuwin can't get out to the world again, he might consider breaking up with him.

"But we are also human, right? We know what is wrong and what is right. We know that it is wrong so we don't do what our instinct tells us to. But if something triggers our possessiveness for our omega, we can't really control ourselves. That's the hardest part of being an alpha."

Phuwin looks at Pond's eyes and he can see the loving gaze there.

"So back to your question, in Joong's case he can't control why suddenly i can smell his omega's scent but he also can't control the possessiveness inside him. Dunk is his omega and he had the privilege to be the only one who could smell him. You know how great the omega's pheromone is affecting us right? And now it might be felt like he had shared part of what is his to other alphas."