Foolish one

Chapter 30

Dear mom

I had a great week in Ibiza with my friends. I think you would be happy to hear that. We tanned, talked, and we even went on a boat trip. I drank responsibly and I kept some of the other girls out of trouble. But the thing I wanted to tell you is that Alexia kissed me, and I kissed her back. I sound like an excited teenager, and I am one. It felt amazing. She is so gentle and very cute. I have no idea what we are, but I hope we will continue to go out. She even asked me out on a date. It was so long ago since I was last out on a date with someone. I wish you were here to help me decide what to wear, and what to do. I think you would like her.

Tomorrow I am going back home. We are all staying with Felix, and I'm going there with Dani and her family. I have put down a deposit for a car, can't keep begging other people for rides forever, you know. I have also been thinking about getting a furry companion. It is quite annoying and tough to be living alone all the time. A dog might help with that.

This summer we have a qualification game for the world cup. Jorge Vilda called me up and informed me that I would probably be starting that game. It feels strange that I get to start important games for the national team at nineteen. And I can't help but to think that he wants something from me. Alexia and Mapí has been listening to me complaining about him, and they are ready to attack if he does something stupid. I don't promote violence, so I better keep an eye on them.

I managed to end this term in school with another good grade. This was my last year in school, and I actually have a degree in mathematics now. Stupid thing to get a degree in, since it is not that usable. A degree in business or in nursing or something like that would have been more usable.

I love and miss you a lot mom

With a lot of love from Elisa

23rd of May 2018

The next day I was sat in the back of my sister's car with her daughter. It was a bit of a drive to Tarragona, but we were all excited to make it. This time it was not for a long stay. We would be there for three days before heading back home to Barcelona. "How was your trip to Ibiza Li?" Dani asked. She wanted to know what was going on in my life. It was in a true big sister manner. "It was great. We had a lot of fun, and we drank a lot. Which is probably not the best thing to do, and I still feel like I don't ever want to drink again. So, you can guess how much it was" I answered with a laugh. "I'm just happy that you are happy Li. It has been a while since I last saw this side of you" she said from the passenger seat of the car,

"Getting new friends and finding a group that I belong in has helped a lot" I answered with a smile. We continued the ride talking about my graduation that would be in the end of the summer. It was great to spend time with my family. They loved me unconditionally and I knew they would always be there for me. Just like they always had.

"Isa" Alicia and Maria yelled as soon as I opened the car door. They threw themselves at me and I barely managed to catch them. "Hola chiquitas" I answered and hugged them tightly. "We have missed you tía" Alicia said with a big smile on her face. "And I have missed the two of you. How about I put you down and then we can grab my bag? Because I brought presents" I offered, and a second later I no longer had a child in my arms. They pulled me towards the car and forced me to grab my bag.

We made our way inside their house, and I got settled on the couch where I would be sleeping for the next couple of days. "Hola Felix" I said and hugged my brother. He had left the kitchen where he was cooking something to say hello to me. "Hola Isa. I have a terrible surprise and I did not know this when I invited you" he said. This caused me to get a bit worried, that did not sound good. "What is it?" I asked. You could hear the worry in my voice. "Dad is here" he said and my world cam crashing down. I did not want to see him. He was no longer someone I wanted in my life.

Our conversation was interrupted by Alicia and Maria who wanted their gifts. I handed them the presents, but I could no longer concentrate on what was in front of me. He was here, and I was scared. 

"It has been a while since I last saw you Elisa" he said. His voice echoed through my head, and I felt panic rising inside me. "I know that, and that is how I want it to be" I answered. I was not going to be calm in this situation. He deserved everything I had to say to him. "I saw you made the national team, and I am so proud of you" he said. He didn't get to do this. I was not going to be his daughter when it was convenient for him. "I should probably head out for a walk" I responded, ignoring everything he just had said.

I left the house with panic rising in my chest. He ruined everything and I hated him. I needed to go back home.

Breath in for three.

Hold for five.

And exhale slowly.

Repeat seven times.

The walk calmed me down and an hour later I returned. I said goodbye to everyone and gave an excuse to Maria and Alicia that something had come up. I was on the next bus to Barcelona alone. This was not how it was supposed to go. Tears were falling down my cheeks, soon enough I was no longer able to see. The panic was settling in, and I was crying hysterically. This was not how the weekend was supposed to go. It was supposed to be relaxing and a chance for me to spend some time with my nieces. 

I walked when I got off the bus. I walked to the only place I knew. I walked to her house. I must have looked like a maniac, with tearstained cheeks, red and swollen eyes, and makeup that was all over the place. Before I knew it, I knocked on her door. She opened it quickly and I could see the concern in her eyes. I fell into her comfortable embrace and sobbed into her shoulder. "It is going to be alright cariño" she repeated softly. We made our way inside her apartment. I was still in her embrace, sobbing uncontrollably.

Time passed quickly, and after some time she had managed to get me calm enough. "What happened cariño?" she asked softly. Tears were still falling down my cheeks, but they were fewer and less panicked. "My dad was there" I got out. "That must have been awful" Alexia said. She continued calming me down, and she was still holding me tight. "It is. I just hate that he wants to be back in my life now that I am going somewhere. He does not get to do that. He can't cause me pain for several years and then just come back like he has done nothing" I said with desperation in my voice. "I think you did the right thing cariño" Alexia said. "Thank you. Thank you for being here" I whispered to her. "No problem" she whispered back.

That was when I kissed her. It was probably not romantic, but I did not care in that moment. She kissed me back, and when she pulled away, I saw confusion in her eyes. "I just felt like kissing you" I answered with a newfound confidence, "I'm glad you did" Alexia said before kissing me once again.

We stayed at her apartment that entire night. I just enjoyed her company, and she enjoyed mine. "What do you want for dinner?" Alexia asked between kisses. I pulled apart to stifle a laugh. "Is that what you are thinking about when we are making out?" I asked while laughing. "But I want homemade pizza" I continued. We cooked dinner together, occasionally stealing kisses from each other.

The dinner was eaten in front of her TV while we shared a bottle of wine. I was sitting between Alexia's legs and whenever there was a short pause in the movie, she leaned down to kiss me. I was enjoying her appreciation quite a bit to be honest.

------------------------------

I love writing this. They are so cute I can almost cry.

I need to get myself a girlfriend, too bad the girl I like sends mixed signals. 

40 votes for the enxt chapter?

------------------------------