Lonely eyes

Chapter 3

Colton is in four other classes of mine including 7th, the last period of the day, I sit impatiently waiting for the bell to ring to dismiss school.

"And that's how you use val.." 'RING'

The bell interrupts Mrs. Vale as she explains about values, and everyone gets up gathering their things and head to the door. I push and shove my way to the front as I race to my locker to put my books in and grab my journal and leave out the doors and  towards the park, knowing just as well that Debby, my step mom, is not going to be home till 7 tonight and the park is 10 minute walk from the school, 3 from my house.

As I walk towards the parking lot I pull my headphones from my pocket and plug them into the headphone jack of my iPhone 5s, clicking shuffle of Spotify. A random song plays through my ears as the scenery around me becomes more and more familiar, as I come to the cemetery about a block from the park I decide today to cut through it. I wive across the head stones catching glimpses of the people they belong to names, as I come to one personally familiar I come to a halt and stand over my fathers grave, "in hearts I hold in memories i will stay" was the quote I chose out and underneath read beloved father son brother and in all a great friend, Tony will be remembered and missed. Goose bumps cover my arms as I squat down beside his resting ground.

"Hi daddy, I miss you" I choke on my words as my hand blazes across the grass, "I wish you were still here.." I let my words fade away as I stand wiping the tears that have fallen and continue my way to where I originally was heading remembering what had happened as if it happened yesterday.

I arrive to the park pushing my dad as far back out of my mind as I can not wanting to face what happened again. I walk towards the swing siting on the one in the middle, the park is often empty after the new one opened in the better part of the neighborhood. But that's what I love about it, it's all mine more than most of the time, the occasional wonders kid or someone looking for space but most the time it's empty. It's worn down play gym sits in the middle of a bark filled pit with rusted squeaky chained swings few feet out side, a broken marry-go- round placed to the side with those spring animals that bounce back and forth sat in the front. Its a simple park, it's canopied with tall tree branches and an old huge willow tree sat in the very back, may be simple but it's simply beautiful to me.

Often times when I come here I'll be found either on the swings or under or in the willow tree. I've drawn that tree a thousand times but never quit captured its full beauty, I sway back and forth on the swing pausing my music to admire the peace of nature and the soft squeaking of the chain. I pull out my sketch book and begin to continue my "life of stars" drawing I began about a week or so ago.

I had drifted from the swings to under my tree when I notice someone wondering into the park, it was a gu... Colton? I peep over my phone as I download more music onto it, how did he find this place? I think to my self as I try to not to catch his attentions as I continue to read the titles of songs scrolled across my phone screen when I hear, "hey.. aren't you that girl in like four of my classes?"

I look up to see Colton standing at my feet glancing down at me. I turn my phone off and set it beside me as I nod my head 'yes' and look down fiddling with my head phones

"Do you mind if I sit with you?" He asks while shifting awkwardly in front of me. "No" I say as I slide over a little and watch as he sits him self down beside me. "what's you name?" He asks and I raise an eye brow towards him in confusion, as in English class we went through who we are and what we like and what was our favorite thing we had done during the summer, but I answer anyway.

"Alex"

He nods and plays with the dried leaves under his hand, as I watch him I wonder why he is talking to me? Why didn't he already know my name from the four classes we had shared earlier today during school? If he didn't care to listen to what I had to say in class why'd he walk up to me just now? As if he read my mind he spoke, " I wasn't ignoring you in class your probably wondering how I didn't already know your name right?"

He turns facing me as I nod looking into his eyes as I study them I don't know what it was about them but I just wanted to keep staring into them, like the stars, learn the stories they held.

"I blank out some times, only catching phases or some words when I'm stressed out or not really interested..." he pauses and looks down, " I wasn't ignoring you in class is all." And with that it was silent again.

Good five minutes past with us just sitting there looking out upon the park watching the swings sway and the marry-go-round turn in the wind when I finally decide to speak.

" I'm not meaning to come off rude..." I pause and look to him to find his eyes already on me as I continue, "I don't talk much I don't find that people care to hear what I say."

His eyes scan over mine, my face, my everything like he's studying me as he says "I saw you talking to those girls in our English class you seemed to have no troubles then."

I nod and pull my knees to my chest and cross my arms over the tops laying my head down looking towards him and say,

"yeah well, their different, it took me 2 years to talk to them as frequently as I do and even then... they don't know who I truly am."

I let my words fade into the nice breeze that swirls around us, never been able to say that a loud but always knowing it.

"I want to get to know you.. The real you not the fake smile I see you front for them, I want to hear the stories that I see ache to spill from your eyes, to scream from your lungs.. I want to know you"

Colton says as he looks toward the rusted old play gym as I stare aimlessly at him, I've always thought I hide it all.. the pain, how could he come along and say theses thing. How can he make me feel like... The stars