a 21st century lover

sunrise. midday. sunset

sunrise. midday. sunset - November 24, 2023

Sunrise. Streaks of gold flash across my eyes. Like the birth of the universe, I see the sky explode with lights and flashes in a single moment. My soul is taken aback with each blink and breath. My head is poised upwards to the heavens as you appeared from nothing, bringing light to this dark, forsaken Earth. You were incredible and breathtaking. I couldn't bear to even look away for one second. If I did, I would have lost you in a single blink. You are the reason why every morning I come alive. The creeping shine that would sneak into my room I shut away from all reality. Indeed, you have given me so much by entering into my life. No matter the day, it was like I knew you would welcome me every morning with a smile that was on par with the divinity of a sunrise.

Midday. You continue to shine the brightest. There isn't a crevice in sight that you don't shine upon. And as I bask in your glory and fiery embrace, I am unable to properly see you. Here at your peak and greatest moment of our lives, I had to turn away. My face can no longer stay poised at you. My eyes shun away your excellence. I know how it may seem. It looks as if I've betrayed your majesty and grace. I understand how it is. How can I, a mere mortal whose heart is only half full, treat someone whose heart is full and overflowing that you would share yours like that? I cannot excuse why I became so avoidant and couldn't find the time to properly appreciate your beauty and patience. Even though I separated us at this hour, it didn't mean I betrayed you. I sit under the shade of the tree and watch as your light flickers and illuminates in between the leaves and branches. I never wavered nor did I abandon you. I watched from afar in this space to see you in a wider picture. I see you in the water, shimmering glitter as the waves ripple and crash. I see you shine your light in the hairs of children playing outside in the sun. I see how you make the entire scenery come to life with brightness and color. The sky may be a cool blue but your aura is a blinding, fiery yellow-white. This is what I saw in you but never said anything. And with that mistake, then, came the end of the day.

Sunset. It is time to count our remaining hours. Minutes. Seconds. You hover beyond the horizon. You look just as beautiful as you did when I first saw you. I would have fallen in love for a second time if it were possible. But as Mother Nature intended for all life, everything had to come to an end. Everything has become a blend of orange and red. The waters barely a have trace of you. The darkness is once again creeping upon me. I rarely feel the warmth but the chills that prick my very skin. I stare back at you as you pack everything you have brought into my life and take it away. Oh, how tragic this is! I am no mythological hero. I have no rope or power to make you stay a second longer. It's time that we part ways. I hope you will once again reappear like the sunrise. But, prayers are still only prayers. For now, we are apart with not a single word heard or understood. Not a single action could be done. The sun has set, and I watch as you take off with no looking back at me. You slowly drown into the other world and I drag myself into the darkness. Here, I poise my head up at the sky once more. There is no cool blue sky. No streaks of gold. No fiery ball of yellow-white. All that my eyes see is the empty space sprinkled with minuscule stars and a crescent moon. And as I take in the new reality, I cry those very stars into tears, reminded of your smile by that mocking crescent moon. I might hate everything. I may curse everything. I grasp at nothing and clench only my fists, wishing for a miracle. On my knees, I beg and barter everything I possess for your sunrise again. There is nothing else I could do as a man who had lost the sun.