Perfect Weapon

Mom, im sorry

"i already tried calling my mom like a hundred times.  i dont know what else to do." i complained
"maybe you should just go over there" toby said standing up and changing the cd.
"i dont know what to do..." i whined burying my face in my pillow.
"just go to her house..." Toby said.
"ugh" i said lifting my head up.
"just. go. to. her. house." toby said .
"fine, but your going with me." i said sitting up.
"West, you know i cant..." toby looked at me and sat down.
"yes you can. slender wont mind, and no one will notice you."
He moned. "do i have to?"
"yupp" i said grabbing my mcr bag.
"fine" he grunted reaching his hands out for me to help him up.
i squinted at him and gave in. i reached my hands out to help him.
"theres my girl" i heard Jeffs voice in the doorway.
"what the hell do you want?" toby said.
i looked at toby. "its fine." i whispered to him.
"are you drunk?" i asked him.
"hehe noo" he slurred.
"were leaving" i said grabbing Tobys hand pulling his through the doorway slamming my door closed.
Once we got out of the house and passed the woods, toby stopped me.
"Calm down. Whe  your like this your not that easy to talk to , no offence." He said.
I noded and kept walking, but calmed myself down.

I knocked on her door, and waited for her to answer.
"West! What are you doing here?" She asked with the same perky expression.
"I came to apologize for.. My family, i should have told you." I spoke clearly.
"Nothing to worry about, love" she smiled and let us in.
"So, This is your boyfriend?"  She looked at Toby.
"Oh, no!" I scoffed.
Toby looked around awkwardly rubbing the back of his neck.
We sat around discussing TV shows and drank tea, I guess that's what mothers and daughters do?
"Well, i really should get going. I have a baby shower to go to." She said.
"Would u like a ride home?" She asked.
"Oh, no thanks. I think were going to head to Roxys' house.
"Ok sweetheart, you are welcome here anytime." She smiled at us. we walked out of the house as she gets in her car.
Toby and I start walking. It was mostly scilent the whole way becides the sound of Toby kicking rocks.
When we got on Roxy's road he stopped me.
"What's going on, West?" He asked.
"What do you mean?
"You know what I mean, how do you somehow come across your mom and-" he started but I cut him  off.
"Look, I'm sorry Toby, I should have told you, hut I didn't want u to freek out or anything."
"W-well?" He asked.
"Carter has been in the hostpital" I said.
He looked at the ground. "Is she ok?" He asked.
"Yeah, she's supposed to get out on Tuesday."
He nodded. "What happend?" He asked.
"Well, uhh.. She tried to commit suicide.." I looked down remembering that morning we found her.
I looked up to see Toby whiping tears away. I know it seems like he isn't really interested in my friends, but there his only friends besides me, he actually cares about them a lot.
When I saw toby crying my first instinct was to hug him. I could feel him shaking. It made me hug him tighter, he followed and almost picked me up. I started crying, I think I haven't cried that much with everything that has happend because It hasn't really hit me yet, I keep telling myself I'm streaming and I'll wake up, but in his arms I realized, this isn't a dream, this is actually happening. I could have lost one of my best friends..
Toby pulled away and whipped my tears away.
"We'll get through this." He said. I noticed the gang was standing behind us.
They all looked at us with sympathetic smiles. We returned the smile before we all came into a group hug.
"I can't believe this actually happend.." Roxy said.  We were all silently agreeing. After a few more seconds of hugging and crying we decided to go inside. We all were in Roxy's room
It was really quiet, everyone kinda just sat there staring into oblivion. I hate seeing my friends like this, I have never seen them so sad before. I hate this. In a way I feel guilty because my thought sound selfish, like I'm blaming it all on carter, but I don't blame her at all. Why were we put  on earth to live and survive, when in the end.. Everyone dies.
Wow, this is depressing..
"Guys?" I ask.
Everyone looked at me.
"Carter would be pissed if she saw us right now."
Everyone nodded in agreement and went back to staring into oblivion.
"Guyyss" I whined.
I got nothing in return.
I pulled my phone and plugged it into the amp on Roxy's dresser and played the ghost of me by MCR. I turned the music up all the way up. My ears were ringing, but I didn't mind. It still didn't get anyone's attention.
I plopped on the bed inbetween Toby and Ace. I felt myself falling asleep. I don't want to wake up.