KHRONICLES OF KHAOTIC KIDNAPPED KIDS

Dorm WHAT!?

"Aizawa, Aizawa, Aizawa." Me and Ida busted into the teachers lounge. "We don't mean to bother you while you are eating cat food but..." Ida trailed off. "That's more concerning than what's happening in the dorms. Our four cats could be eating that right now Dad," I said. "Spit it out," Dad demanded with a full mouth.

"Bakugo burned Todoroki's room down because Todoroki called him "bestie". Bakugo and Deku are trying to kill each other because Bakugo took Deku's All Might figure as a joke." Iida listed. "And Bakugo taped someone to the wall with Sero's quirk," I added casually.

"Someone? Who's someone!?! Why aren't you guys concerned!" Cat food spurted from Dad's mouth. "It's mineta," Ida said slowly. "Oh," Dad relaxed. "You know that might be good for all of us."

"I'm calling the police! This is out of control behavior and very serious!" Vlad King declared stupidly. "No need. Things like this happen all the time. I know what to do," Dad got up from his seat nonchalantly. "All the time!? Someone is going to end up dead!" Vlad king was cut off by Nezu: "Trust me, Erasure deals with this 24/7. He knows what he's doing."

We run to our classroom to see Deku in a headlock. "Bakugo! Put him down!" Dad ordered and Deku quickly dropped to the floor. "He's good," Katsuki assured us. "Apologize, Bakugo!" Dad said. "No way. He attacked me while I was still burning down Icy Hots room. I was just playing with him by stealing his stupid toys." "TOYS!?!"

Dad went to Todoroki's room before we could hear Deku go on about his precious figures. "Todoroki! Put out the fire with your ice quirk," Dad directed. "Oh yeah." Mineta was indeed stuck to the wall and was getting scolded by Shoji and Jiro. As he should.

"Okay. Bakugo, Todoroki, and Midoryia, all of you are going to go to conflict resolution.....and therapy." "Can I come to? For moral support?" I asked. Aizawa put a hand in my head. "Of course sweetheart. But first I have an announcement."

....

"No no no no Aizawa sensei you can't!" Ururaka whined. "I can because I'm the teacher and the adult here. I'm in control. Not really but." "Strike!" I stood on my desk with my brown fist up. "We will not settle for unfair rules!" Katsuki also stood up. "Sit down," Dad said. "Ok." I took my seat. "I'm creating dorm rules. Ever since you guys all got close and got dorms you have been out of control. I blame Mable."

I nodded proudly. I would like to say I brought everyone together after I started to get comfortable. "First rule, Mable and Bakugo, no being...so close. It's creepy." "Why? We are like two pods in a pee," I said.
"Each Others ride or dies," Katsuki added. "I would rather die then ride but y'know." "We are like Mable's face and acne," Katsuki said. "I might not have a quirk but I'm mighty fine at fighting," I said.

It's true. I had to work extra hard to get on everyone with a quirks level but I managed. "People always ask if your friend jumped, would you? Obviously yes." Katsuki said. "I would be the one jumping. Me and Katsuki are like my coochie and his--" "OK we get it, you can stop." Dad raised a hand. "Y'all could have said peanut butter and jelly or something," Kirishima frowned.

"Peanut butter in a cup!" Katsuki sung. "We sing this song to pump us up!" I chorused "Bang bang Choo Choo train." We sung in unison. "Come on Mable do your thang!" "I can't!" "Why not?" "I just can't!" "Why not!?" "My back is aching, my bras too tight, my bootys shaking from the left to the right." I answer. Dad tapped his clip board while shaking his head. "To the left, to the right, to left, to the right..." "OK Katsuki let's stop before Dad sends me to the adoption center right after he adopted me a month ago."

"Could you guys please stop making jokes about your trauma?" Dad asked nicely. "One time I tried defending my mom while my Dad beat her but he just beat her more. I mean I know I fucked up but Jesus." We all look horrified at Todoroki. I raised my hand. "Mable no--" "My uncle beat me after I didn't train at three in the morning after spending the whole day before training." I said. Dad sighed. "We will revisit the rules some other time."

A/N: I will give this warning now. There probably will be more dark humor in this story so you can go if it makes you umcomfy, it's ok. Anyway, this was really fun to write. Thank you so much for reading this far !! What's your favorite anime?