Painful Love

My Love Mine All Mine

The door closed behind Alec. He was glad to have left the meet-up, but he knew he would have to face the consequences for it later. Dropping his bag on the floor, Alec didn't even bother to take his jacket off. It was Caleb's and it felt cold, but it was better than his old sweatshirt, all filled with holes.

He let himself fall to the floor. Not two seconds later, he was silently shaking like a leaf. He couldn't even cry. Alec was exhausted like he hadn't been in so long. As he let out shaky breaths, he rocked himself on the floor.

All he wanted was to sleep. He really needed sleep, proper rest. He had until Caleb came back, though. Once his boyfriend was back, he'd have to stay awake and alert; Alec hoped Caleb was having so much fun with his friends he didn't even think about him.

Alec's excuse had been a headache. He had had to insist and pretend a lot, but he had managed to leave and go back to Caleb's apartment, feeling his partner's eyes burning holes in his back.

Eight hours out of the house, in a stranger's home, having to talk and be extremely careful around people because of the bruises on his body and his instinctive reactions. He had had to laugh a lot at people's lame jokes, pretend and interact more than he was capable of.

At some point, he had messed up. Caleb had found him in the kitchen, actually talking like a normal person with one of his friends. He had stayed with them, talking in a passive aggressive manner towards the other man, until his friend had left.

Then, Caleb had dragged Alec to the bathroom and had made him apologize for flirting with another man after having been left unsupervised.

"You think it's nice to cheat on me like that?"

"I—I didn't—... I wasn't—..."

"With one of my friends? That's like you're trying to purposefully offend and hurt me."

"B—But I was just t—talking—...!"

"Let me speak." Caleb hissed, taking ahold of Alec's face harshly. "You were trying to cheat on me. Do not talk to me like I'm stupid, Alec. I'm serious, you better treat me with the same respect I treat you with."

"C—Caleb—..."

"Don't fucking talk back! I want you to apologize to me. Now. Properly."

"Here?" Alec paled.

"Do I look like I'm joking? Yes, here, for fuck's sake. Come on."

Alec stayed in silence for some seconds. He looked around and noticed Caleb hadn't locked the door. And he was definitely not going to, which meant that Alec had to be fast. He knew what he had to do, so, mortified, he spoke.

"C—Can we do it at home, p—please?"

"Alec. If you don't start right now, I'll undress you myself right now."

Some more seconds in silence, until Alec understood Caleb wasn't going to wait any longer.

"I apologize for t—trying to cheat on you. P—Please, forgive me..." He stuttered out, unfastening his boyfriend's belt with trembling hands, as he fell to his knees.

Soft whimpers came from Alec, whose head was now against his knees. He wanted to forget what Caleb had made him do in that bathroom. The way he had forced him to stay still and endure it in silence.

His rocking became steadier and more regular as the seconds went by. He wanted to cry, but the sobs caught in his throat. Exhaustion had consumed him, leaving him incapable of letting out sounds any louder than low, muffled cries.