The Jolt

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(MAJOR TRIGGER WARNING: GRUESOME EVENTS, MENTION OF SA, ABUSE, SH, ATTENTIVE SUICIDE, TRANSPHOBIA, HOMOPHOBIA,  PTSD, ANXIETY, AND GRAPHIC DETAILING)

Sonic POV:

I couldn't breathe, I could barely see either. No tension... not even a movement. I couldn't feel my body, I just laid there on the ground like I was a broken record. All of a sudden the land around me slowly turns pitch black. All of a sudden I could breathe, I could move and feel my body. I gasped and sat up. I felt staggering pains all over my body. It was too much at once. I looked at my arms and what of my body I could see. There were scorched marks on my legs and arms. Third degree burns on my arms, legs, stomach... everywhere. I was so weak and fragile, I could feel every bone and every ruined muscle trying to move. My left paw hurt, I couldn't even move it... seems like it is broken. I looked around, seeing nothing but darkness. Trying to stand up, it was agonizing. I gripped my chest which burned when I took in oxygen. I then hear different voices surrounding me. I stumbled back and landed on the broken paw and yelped. I groaned, rolling on my side and shivering.

Sonic: "Fuck, this... is s-so painful..."

I took a deep breath as I sit up and hold my paw in my other. My eyes then widen, seeing everything had changed around me. I looked at the room I was in. It was a small girls room with different shades of light pink and purples. The bed was a silk with some frills on the edges of the blanket. The curtains on the windows were a darker shade of pink. Seeing girly dolls all in the room. Seeing the dresser had dresses stuffed in it of Lolita dresses and clothing. I knew this room... this room... it was my childhood room. I felt my body shivers and just gags at the sight of this room. It was filled with bad memories I never wanted to remember. 'Why was I here? Why was I in this disgusting room?' I thought to myself as I then heard the door open. I turn around and see myself... but when I was a little girl. Looking down at Samantha (His younger self) just the two of them staring at one another. Samantha tilts her head and fixes the white frilly dress she wore. Maybe about 2'5 in height. She was so small, or well... I was small... ha. She spoke to me as she smiled.

Samantha: "Hello, mister! Are you okay...? You seem really hurt..."

The memory clicked... there was no way. When I was younger, I had an imaginary friend. Which, who I named myself after. But all I could see was their injuries and a blacked out body. 'Was I... was I talking to my future self when I was younger?' The thought made me a bit sick to my stomach. Taking a deep breath I reply.

Sonic: "I'll be okay, just a few scratches..."

Samantha: "... But it looks painful. How'd you get them?"

My throat tightened at the question. I almost couldn't think. Slowly responding to her.

Sonic: "I was uhm... sacrificing myself for the one I love. For him to be safe..."

Samantha: "... 'him'? You mean 'her' right?"

Sighing, I knew this was a rough question to explain to my younger self... this was odd though, how I was literally saying everything I remember when I was younger.

Sonic: "Nope, I mean 'him'. His name is Shadow... or well, you technically named him in a way. But... we will not go further into that. But yes, we are both a he."

She went quiet, the tension building. Now I understand what this side of the conversation feels like. Her face then lit up as she jumped and smiled.

Samantha: "I never knew two misters could be together! That's so cool! I know my parents wouldn't like it though..."

The memory got more vivid, that's when I realized... this was the last time I ever saw the shadow figure when I was younger... which was me. My mind spun into a deep thought, wondering what I was going to do. What was after this... what will happen to me. I shook my head and sighed.

Sonic: "Yeah, it must suck being in a family like that... huh?"

Samantha: "Yeah! I wonder what it would be like for me to be with a girl! But then again... I want to be like a boy... they have so much freedom."

Sonic: "... I can relate to that a lot."

She lowered her head as she sat on her bed. She then looked back at me and smiled.

Samantha: "But when I get older, when I leave... I'll be just like my brother! My older brother... he is such a nice guy. He puts on such a confident look, he fights for what he believes in, he even puts others before him... He is such a hero in my eyes."

I felt my eyes tear up, I literally ended up like my brother. The one I lost at such a young age. 'Man, if only I could have at least got to give him a hug or see him right now...' I thought.

Sonic: "Yeah, I uhm... had an older brother just like that. I guess we have a lot of similarities we never knew about."

Samantha: "Yeah... Mister, I have a question."

Sonic: "Ask away."

Samantha: "When will you come back? It get's kind of lonely here..."

My heart sank, I remember asking that... I remember begging for him to stay. But something just seemed to keep him away from being around younger me. I took another short but deep breath.

Sonic: "I don't know, kiddo... but uhm, do you want a hug before I go?"

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Sonic POV: 

I could feel myself getting more and more tired. I never knew this was what was going to happen. This felt like a rip in reality in itself. Samantha nodded her head and hopped off her bed and hugged me. I hugged her back with my good paw and sighed. I knew this was going to be rough after this. Maybe the world continuously loops and she will be going through the same thing I will when she gets older... an endless loops of suffering, yet knowing the outcome without being able to tell her. God... it stung. I stopped hugging her as the room went pitch black all of a sudden again. My head started to hurt as I groaned I fell back onto the ground gripping my head as I yelled and kicked from how bad the pain was. I lie over on my side as I close my eyes tightly and grit my teeth. And once I open them, I see a ruined land. It was dark... harsh, no land on it, empty. I couldn't breathe again, just staring at the land as I felt my lungs begging for some air. A loud ringing in my ears shot through as I started hearing someone yelling my name.

Shadow: "Sonic!!"

I still couldn't move, I could only see. My lungs are burning and aching. My body slowly felt like it was under agonizing pain. I was numb, yet could feel everything.  I finally heard footsteps coming towards me at a rapid pace behind me. My vision was ruined but I could see up close enough to depict what was going on. Shadow placed his paws on my waist and head. His shaky body gripping at me. He turned me over and I could just barely see his face. He covered his mouth as he teared up. All I could see was him, not the world around him, like a focused camera. Shadow nudged me, almost shaking me. He was mumbling underneath his breath, I couldn't hear a word he said.

Shadow: "... Please... Oh god no. No, Sonic. You can't be gone! Please!"

All I could hear was please... his begging shattered my heart while I couldn't do anything. But only watch Shadow breakdown above him. I couldn't even tell him it was okay. My mouth was just barely hanging open. I couldn't even move my eyes... this was scary... not being able to move. I felt so stuck and confined. I then heard someone loudly groaning and some heavy footsteps. Silver stood above and behind Shadow as he just stared at my body. But I could see it in his eyes, the regret... the shame of it all. Silver spoke, but I couldn't hear him... I couldn't even read his lips properly.

Silver: "Shadow... I-... I'm sorry, this wasn't supposed to-."

I then saw Shadow jump up and get in Silver's face. Everything around me... it felt so dark and cold.

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No POV:

Shadow: "You didn't mean to?! Huh?! What the fuck kind of excuse is that?!"

Silver froze and limped when he took a few steps back.

Silver: "Shadow... that has never happened. I've done it to multiple people who were only here to destroy and hurt. But this... this was something else. These gems weren't stolen, they chose him. He..."

Shadow: "Cut the bullshit! You made a fucking awful mistake and you're trying to justify it with everything you got. God dammit, just admit you were in the wrong this entire time! You even killed Knuckles to only fucking kill Sonic! You have done nothing but cause us harm... so what makes you think that Sonic was ever a damn threat, when you were the one trying to fucking kill us all?!"

Silver went completely quiet, his eyes tearing up. He realized he was fully in the wrong, but he couldn't admit to this. He didn't want to admit it. He stared at Sonic's unresponsive corpse. His wings hanging down and the ends of the ripped feathers rested on the ground. He gripped his injured arm and took a shaky breath in.*

Silver: "... Y-Yes I killed him. But this wasn't supposed to happen! I never meant to kill him... I never meant to bring harm... I've just lived alone all my life. When people invade I get protective. I once saw this place look exactly like this. I did what I could to fix it, and-"

Shadow: "And you only repeated it..."

The silence was choking at Silver's throat, he felt heavy. Looking down at the ebony alien as he hung his head low. Shadow growled and pushed Silver.

Shadow: "You did nothing but hurt everyone around you, as well as the world you swore to protect. How did that work out for you buddy?!"

Silver closed his eyes tightly as he grit his teeth. He couldn't take this... he felt so disgusted with himself. Even resulting to murder Knuckles, it was such a gut churning thought. He shook his head as he yelled.

Silver: "Look! I did what I thought was right! If you followed your gut, had past experiences with everyone trying to hurt your world... trying to kill you and do harm... you would have done the fucking same! I never meant for this to ever happen! You don't get to say what's right or wrong! Because you go with what your instincts tell you to do... don't you?! So shut up and give me a break!"

Shadow: "No! You didn't even give us the fucking chance to explain ourselves. You just immediately guessed we were villains! I used to be like that... but I gave this life a chance. And fuck it, fuck all of it. I'm done with you! I am done with everything! Sonic was the only one here for me... even Knuckles, Tails as well. I blew it with all of them! And now I'm gonna fucking teach you a damn lesson you winged freak!"

Shadow launched at Silver... who was severely injured. Shadow pushed Silver to the ground and tried strangling him. His rage runs through his body. His blood boiling as his tears up from the frustration. Silver choked, but then was able to use his weak wings to push him up and get closer to Shadow's head. Throwing a punch to Shadow's head as he fell off of Silver. He groaned and gripped at his throbbing cheek. He didn't seem to care as his adrenaline rushes around inside him. Shadow turned as he saw Silver gasping for air and bent over. Silver groaned as he stood up and felt Shadow tackle him from behind. His arms locked around Silver's neck and head.

Shadow: "Tell me you're in the wrong! Tell me you dishonored your tribe! You fucking disgusting life form!"

 Silver groaned as he tried gasping for air. His adrenaline finally kicked into gear as his teal and / or turquoise symbols started to glow. His eyes turning pure yellow as he yelled. Using his wings to shove Shadow off his back. Shadow yelped when he hit the rocky, mangled ground. Silver was panting as he slowly turned his head to meet Shadow's view.

Silver: "You think you're so fucking mature... you think you know everything. You and your stupid species was the reason this planet was ruined in the first place! Tell me, if you think you're so god damn high and mighty... then why the hell do you think I was after you? Only you! But once I saw Sonic with the gems, I had two big priorities. You think I just went off for no damn reason?! No! Your heritage was the reason I was left behind with nothing left! I didn't want it to repeat... but it did anyway. This isn't all my fault... this isn't my fault I saw you and was afraid for my world. Like you were for Sonic. He was your world. And now that he is gone, you're doing everything to get revenge. Looks like someone is just like me, you just wont admit that to yourself..."

Shadow went silent as he got back up from the ground. Gripping at his stomach as he felt nauseous. Silver was right... he was only fighting because his own world was gone... in his eyes. It hurt too much to just let it go. Shadow still blames Silver for it all, not being able to give it all up now. His red stripes glowed and his eyes went and turned to a pure neon orange. An aura glowing around Shadow, a red and orange shade. While Silvers was yellow and turquoise. Silver stared at Shadow's back as the ebony alien grew more agitated by the moment. Shadow finally turned around, gripping at his gut. His head was a bit lowered, but you could just see his eyes glaring up into Silver's soul.

Shadow: "Don't... talk to me... you insufferable scum..."

Silver sighed, knowing he wouldn't get to Shadow. They both lunged at one another as the collision of the two brewed a light show. The top alien species against the endangered. You can hear each little groan and knock back coming from the two.

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(TRIGGER WARNING)

Sonic POV:

I still couldn't move, I could hear everything now. I wanted to cry, sob... break up the fight. This was so scary. Not even being able to move my eyes to see what was going on. Those two are going to tear each other apart. All of a sudden it became pitch black as I was able to breathe again. I gasp and sit up... looking around and seeing nothing but darkness surrounding me. I could already feel the tears filling in my eyes due to not being able to fix this hellish nightmare. Putting my paws over my eyes and shivering while curling up. I then heard noise behind me as I peaked from my fingers, my pupils going slit. It was Eggman and me lying on the metallic surgical table on the ship. I felt like I was about to gag. Seeing him undressing as I curl back up and hide my eyes. My quills perking out of my fur as the discomfort went through my shaky body. I didn't hear any noise behind me anymore, but now in front of me. I took my paws of my teary eyes as I see my two parents arguing and my mother getting slapped. My gut wrenching as I winced, it was like I could feel it. All of these memories... I drowned out. No... no, I can't do it. I can't even breathe properly as I grip at the sides of my head. I then look over and saw Tails dead on the ground bleeding out. Seeing the gaping hole from his stomach... just lying there. I gagged again and became shaky. I then looked over to see Knuckles' corpse as well. I felt on edge, almost throwing up from the anxiety attack. Hearing screaming... seeing memories of my sister and brother disappearing. I finally snapped as I stand up.

Sonic: "SHUT UP!"

It went silent as I caught my breath and gripped my chest. Salivating from how harsh my breathing was from earlier. My body was still in such agony from the injuries I have endured, but my adrenaline was up higher than my fake ego. I then heard two people speaking, turning around as I saw my brother... but his eyes were scratched out, and then my mom was talking to him.

Mother: "Look, she can't know..."

Brother: "What do you mean she can't know?"

I don't remember this at all, as I stare at this vision. Glaring at my mother, feeling sick while hearing her disgraceful voice.

Mother: "We are trying to protect her because others gave her to us. She is special... more than you know!"

Brother: "The fuck you mean?! You're trying to protect her but she wants to run away more than be with you."

Mother: "She is an alien, Manic!"

The silence grew in the room, even though I was taken aback... who were they talking about?!

Manic: "... You're telling me... Samantha, my little sister... is an alien. You've lost your damn mind."

My heart sank. What do they mean. I was now an alien when I got to this planet. These gems... they chose me. But...

Mother: "Look, they came to us... the royal family of Mobius. Their species is failing and they wanted to keep her safe. If she is in harms way, their world can never move on."

Manic: "... What if I do tell her...?"

Mother: "You better not, Manic... I swear to go if you do this..."

Manic: "She deserves to know every right about this! You aren't even her real parent and you're deciding to do whatever to her. I'm telling her... and you're not stopping me!"

I felt my throat get tight. trying to breathe and focus on what was going on. Am I really not a mobian? I am actually an alien... no, this can't be real? My mom, my dad... they were... they were caretakers of this planet. 'These gems, they didn't just randomly choose me... is this my home planet? Holy fuck, I've found it... I-' My thought was cut off by the scene in front of me. My mother turned her head slightly to the guard behind her and whispered.

Mother: "... Kill him..."

My body froze as I saw my brother get grabbed and tugged at. He yelled and begged to be let go. The way he started crying... I've never seen him cry. How he was shaking and screaming for help, but no one heard him. I then watched as he was stabbed in the chest. My paws shook as I let my own tears drip. My body was tense from the disgusting pain and what I had to witness. Not only was I sad, I was enraged by what my mother had done. I thought I was related to a disgusting, horrid mobian. But it turns out... I wasn't. I may not know my parents, but I know they would have never let this happen. My rage gave me a headache, I felt my body produce small bolts of electricity. It stung and agitated my skin. I whined and yelled. As I then scream.

Sonic: "YOU NEVER DESERVED TO BE MY MOTHER! YOU NEVER DESERVED A CHANCE! AND I'LL PROVE TO YOU I'M MORE THAN JUST SOME LITTLE IN DENIAL GIRL! I AM PROUD OF WHO I AM, AND YOU ONLY WANTED TO HARM ME! YOU FUCKING SICKO! IF I EVER SEE YOU IN THE AFTERLIFE... YOU WILL PAY FOR MANIC'S DEATH! HE WAS MORE OF FAMILY THAN YOU EVER WERE!"

I had been waiting to let out those feelings for so long. The bolts of electricity were getting brighter and more painful to hold.

Sonic: "You don't have power over me anymore. You were nothing but a scum that I was stuck to live with. Someone holding me back. Not anymore... not now. I will end this, I may have gone through hell and back. I may have tried to give up, I may have gotten hurt left and right. But dammit, Knuckles was right. I'm a stubborn airhead, and I will follow through with my promises. I will protect my world... even if hell takes me! I will crawl out of the pits of suffering to protect what I have been fighting for! I will not... give... UP!"

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At that moment I yelled and shut my eyes tight. I opened them to see the ruined wasteland I had created once more. I still couldn't feel my body, but I was bound and fucking determined. I moved my eyes, seeing the two of them still fighting... both were battered and bruised. I grit my teeth as I fought to get my body working. I wasn't ready to die, not yet. This isn't me... I'm not a quitter... I'm a fighter! 'GET THE FUCK UP SONIC!' I thought harshly to myself. Turning my body on its side with such a struggle. Barely able to feel my paws as I push on the ground to get up. I felt the air I took in sting and scrape at my dry and wary lungs. I groan as I slowly get myself up ever so slightly. My elbows pushing at the ground as well as my paws now in fists to keep me up. I shut my eyes tight as the pain burned and peeled my skin. Fur was falling off my body as I was determined to get my mangled body off the ground. As I yelled trying to get up. All of a sudden I felt the middle gem shift back into it's place. Feeling my body grow lighter. The gems grew bright as I then heard a huge thud from Shadow and Silver. Silver was pinned to the ground, blood and ruined. As he then noticed me... moving... my body is shining in a godly light. Silver pushed Shadow off as they both stopped and saw me get up. They freeze as my body was only a figure of light. No details... no facial expression. Just the shell of me, it was almost like I was an auto pilot. As I then felt my body morph, change in the blindness of light. The light then left my body and turned into light specks that surrounded me. They were focused on the lights, as they then saw me. I now have wings, my body looks completely different, the coloring... it was like I took the role of a god. All they could see was my back, but they knew this was the change they would have never expected. My body is still practically glowing in this broken world. Not moving a single inch until I turn my head slightly and give them a soft look of nothing but peace. I spread my wings out, pretty much expressionless. I turn my body around to face the two of them. Looking down on the two as I feel my guilt... the pain, the anxiety... all of it was missing now. Nothing but utter peace in my mind and body.


To Be Continued.  .  .


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