Yours Is The Only Ocean

Chapter Fifteen

Chapter Fifteen

In his head, Miles replied with the same words, but he couldn't say them out loud. He wanted Alex to think he was asleep and hadn't heard. In his lifetime he had come so close to death, he'd been practically able to feel the fires of Hell being stoked to welcome him....sword fights with pirates whose ships he'd attacked, a musket held to his head by a shipmate who'd gone insane and wanted to kill everyone on board. He'd been in more tropical storms that almost wrecked his ship, than the average Englishman had gone walking in rain....but this with Alex was singularly the most frightening thing that had ever happened to him.

He'd seen plenty of men lose their head over some pretty girl....or boy...making them act crazy like they'd been bewitched, and Miles never quite understood it. Of course he knew what love felt like...all his life he'd loved Liam like a brother and now he loved Dom and Lana like they were siblings, and he would do anything for them. But this was different. It was selfish and grasping and Alex had become like oxygen to him, an necessary part of his being and without him he felt like he wouldn't be able to live. He didn't want to share him with anyone and the things they shared were theirs alone. It truly felt as though someone had ripped his heart from him and given it to the person currently lying in his arms. He was in love with Alex and he didn't even know how it had happened.

Alex had fallen back off to sleep, his body going heavy and his breathing snuffly. Even that sounded like the most beautiful noise in the world to Miles. Alex spent so much time worrying and fretting and trying to put the world to rights, to hear him content and peaceful made Miles happy. Last night when he'd been crying, it had taken all Miles' strength not to cry too, as though he could somehow feel Alex's pain, and that in itself frightened him. That had been when the thunderbolt had hit him, and so something within the essence of himself had changed.

Looking back, he realised all the angst he'd felt from the moment he'd met Alex was because he'd got under his skin, like one of those horrible tropical diseases that infected every part of your body. There had been nights back in London when he'd not been able to sleep, just lying awake reliving Alex's kiss, then going to the window and staring up at the moon – that faithful globe in the sky that had so often helped him navigate ships – and wonder if Alex couldn't sleep too and was looking out of his window at the moon. He'd told Miles that night in Bluff Cove about how his grandfather, who'd been a sailor, had taught him the significance of the moon and Alex found it fascinating. Miles remembered listening to him and thinking how innocent and sweet he was and not seeing it as a weakness, but a strength. Miles lived in a world where no one could be trusted, and Alex's wholesomeness was refreshing.

Soon, the soft rhythmic sound of Alex's breathing got to him and he felt himself losing consciousness. His last thought being what the hell was going to happen when they work up the next morning.

He was awoken by the sound of water tinkling. Wearily opening his eyes, he was met with the very pleasant sight of Alex pissing in the chamber-pot in the corner. The widow's peak and beautiful face wasn't the only this he shared with Kitten, he had that same narrow waist and full, perfectly rounded backside. Miles dreamed of one day fucking him....so they could be joined properly. But there was no hurry. That would be a big step, and Miles didn't want to scare him.

"The bed's cold," he chuckled softly.

Alex glanced over his shoulder and smiled, his hair flopping over his face. Miles felt his morning wood get even harder.

"Good morning," Alex said.

"Mornin' beautiful."

Alex giggled girlishly and shook himself. He then turned and returned to bed. Miles reached out and grasped his hand, pulling him down.