Look At Them Now: A Jelena Ending

And Now Its Goodbye For Us

SELENA'S POV

I'm afraid of what they'll say once my single comes out. The past few weeks I've become glued to the studio. Late nights filled with treacherous tears I thought I moved on from. Hurt spilling into words as I scribbled down everything that came from our situation.

I needed to get out my side. I want to be heard for once. I want those to see how toxic relationships often blur the red flags you hoped didn't exist. I still found ways to excuse him for his action because his love still mended me together even when I knew we weren't ready. But how could you ever be ready if you don't just go for it? That's what we did and failed, miserably.

One shot, one last time before it ended abruptly. I'm grateful for the time we spent but often I found myself wishing it was us in the end.

"Sel?" I heard Teresa's soft voice fill my ears taking me away from my intrusive thoughts. I looked up, my eyes weighing down as I stared at her. "Are you okay?"

"I miss him T." I sighed, pushing back the small hairs that made their way to the front of my face when I sat up straight. It's true, I did miss him. I miss seeing his infamous smile directly in front of me. His stupid jokes that could keep me laughing for hours. The feel of his warmth as his arms wrapped tightly around me. He wasn't a bad guy, I will always defend that. But, I can't say his actions didn't feel like countless knifes being plunged in my back forcing open wounds.

"This is for the best Selena. He wasn't ready. He's still figuring things out." She said, rubbing a hand on my back in attempt to soothe me.

"How do you figure things out while moving on with another women?" I asked, disbelief displaying in my words.

"We'll never be able to fully understand how men think and even though he hasn't been my favorite person these last few years with you. I know he loves you with how he looked at you." She looks around trying to find her next words and huffs when it clicks. "He just doesn't know how to provide it to you. I know it doesn't make sense, but what does in this life?"

"Sometimes I wonder whose side you're on," I lightly smile, hoping she can catch my joke. But she didn't, instead a sad smile creeped at the corner of her lips.

"Yours Selena always, but I know how important he was to you." She states. He still is very important but I no longer want to give out that energy. I don't want to give anyone a reason to be hung up on the jelena fantasy. Unfortunately, Teresa's words made my mind swirl back to November of last year when we decided to try.

8 months ago

He reached out again and my heart pumped so loudly, I thought it was going to burst. I haven't heard from Justin since our last meet up in 2016 when we were both failing at giving other people chances. We somehow found our way back to each other and maybe that's because I didn't know how to say no because I want it to be him. So I replied back, we caught up a bit and now he's sitting across from me in a gray hoodie, his hair a little longer than what I've been use to and he still looks good.

A few things about me changed too. I'm blonde now, something I've wanted to do for a while or maybe it was to get his attention since I've only seen him with blondes after me.

"You look beautiful you know," he says, playing with the strings of his hoodie. "I don't even know where to begin." He sighs heavily.

"Try, I'm always going to listen Justin." I assure him. My burgundy leather jacket hung tight against my arms and it was what I needed to get through this conversation. If it wasn't going to be support from my friends then at least I had this jacket to hold me down as I stared at his face. He was lost but the sparkle in his eyes never left whenever they found mine.

"I love you, I really do and I know I've messed up pretty bad these past couple of years but I can never get you out of my head. I try giving new relationships and they work for a while until I find myself missing every moment with you. Everything reminds me of you as much as I try to push it away and for me I'm trying to figure out if that means something. If we keep coming back for each other then we're destined for the end, no?" He asks, searching in my eyes as he waits for my response. Does it mean that? Or is it because we don't know how to fully say goodbye to what was us. We dated so young and with the media and our careers we were growing up with each other, not a single guidance to help us through it. Just countless hours of hard work, scrutiny and hope that things will come out for the better.

"Justin, I know you love me and I love you too but each time we try something always brings us down. It's hard to believe sometimes that we're meant to be," I say, hurt flashes through his face.

"Sel don't tell me that. I don't want to believe that. I want to believe that we're it, that we can make it. I can't picture a life without you,"

"Sounds like a proposal," I playfully say, causing him to flash me a cheesy smile.

"I want to." He says, no lies evident in his voice.

"I'm not ready for that. I want to see how we make it work. I know I haven't been perfect neither. I get angry and jealous and I hate the female attention you get everywhere we go. I get it I do, you're Justin Bieber, every girl goes wild for you but sometimes I feel like you get lost in that and forget that the one girl that should make you flutter your heart is me."

"I do!" He argued.

"You don't. If you did I wouldn't feel half the things I do with you. For once, look at things from my perspective. I've given you the benefit of the doubt but at my feelings expense."
He shuffled in his seat, his lips switching to a thin line as he took in the words. He dragged his hand through his face, releasing a small groan. His leg shook as he stared up at the ceiling. A few moments of silence passed us before his attention was directed to me again.

"I'm sorry, you're right. I'm trying to be better for you."

"I don't need you to be perfect Justin, I just need you to love me correctly." He nodded his head listening intently. His finger lightly went to poke my nose causing me to scrunch up and emitting a soft giggle from my lips.

"I miss that laugh so much, especially if it's me causing it." I smiled sweetly as my head fell into my head. He grinned widely and I know in this very moment there was some peace between us.

"I miss you, Justin"

"Let's make it right between us, okay? No matter what it takes." I thought about it looking between him and anything else around us before I nodded my head. "Can I get a hug?" I didn't even hesitate before my body began moving forward reaching out to him and letting take me into his embrace. I smiled against him, nothing felt like home then his arms around me. Whatever it takes, we'll do it and if it doesn't work out then we tried in the end. That was enough.

"Did you decide on the release date?" Asked Teresa and once again I had to shake myself of these memories. I know I didn't want to release it now, it was too soon and given the lyrics I knew putting it out right now would only stir the pot. I love him, I think I always will and that means as long as he's happy then so am I even if it means shedding a few more tears until I accept it.

"Sometime in October." I answered. October was only three months away but it felt right.

We packed up our belongings before shutting the lights to the studio and preparing to embrace the storm of paparazzi's outside. I threw on some shades, letting my hair fall in front of me as a shield as I stepped outside to a 100 flashes. I hurriedly walked to the car, getting into the passenger seat as Teresa got on the other side. I look at my hands shaking slightly, the anxiety was building and I couldn't wait to be away from this area.

AN: I've finally come to continue part two. I've been in my delusional era when it comes to these two and it's okay. This is all just fictional and I know I don't know what happened personally between the both of them but I do assume it was amicable given the time Justin had to defend his relationship on the internet and stated he will always love/have love for Selena back in 2020/2021 (sorry I can't remember the date). Hope you enjoyed this bit, some things may be different in this story than they are in real life but that's why it's called fiction :)