2024: my digital diary

03.14 The Festival of Light

03.14
On Thursday, Nate texted me.

We ended up smoking weed at the door of SDA at night with Emma.

Emma told some stories about her and her uncle, who had serious drug abuse problems and hit her as a child when he was high, and about doing drugs at a quite early age. We went home soon, at around 2:30, and I slept at Nate's.

03.15
The next day, I woke up at Nate's. I went to the supermarket down the street to buy some bread and I prepared tea and breakfast for Nate and I, which we ate in the balcony. After that, we got ready to take a walk though the city centre, while talking and drinking a lemon beer. We went to see the one of the fire spectacles at 13:00.

I texted Igor to ask for something and he told me that Pamela (his situationship from Budapest) was coming over to the Festival of Light, so I texted her and she told me she was going to DNA that night.

Later on, Nate cooked for me and then we ate in the living room. I left to go to my place, I showered and I changed clothes. I went back out at 19. At 20, I went to Palace, since I knew Bullet was going to be there and I wanted to say hi to him.

He was inside, working, but he had time to come outside with me to smoke some cigarettes and talk as his friends joined and told anecdotes and explained how we had come to know each other. In the group, there was a guy I have seen in some DNA parties, who is super attractive, but I didn't speak a word to him, nor did he to me. I texted Sonny and he joined us halway through. I asked if he wanted to come to DNA and he said yes, so I bought the tickets for us. I asked Bullet to get me an MDMA pill for the night and then Sonny and I were off.

Sonny and I joined Nate and his friends at Tower Square and went to a party.

Rachel and Emma joined afterwards.

Sonny and I stole a beer and had some tequila shots. Then Hellen and some friends of her joined too.

Together, we all walked to DNA, ready to start the party.

Hellen, Sonny and I went inside to get our tickets and as I was walking in, Owen opened the door, walking out.

He smiled and gave me a hug and excitedly he said to me "did you know Pamela is here?" I laughed and told him I did and he laughed that he was the only one who didn't know. I grabbed his arm lightly to tell him that I only knew because of Ivar. After him, Will walked right out of the door and he was quite happy to see me, giving me a warm hug.

Throught the night I had about 3/4 of the pill that Bullet gave me. I saw Pamela and Gina inside, and gave Pamela a very warm hug.

I had lots of fun, jumping around. Hellen told me I was very pretty but I'm not sure I believe her. A friend of Rachel's told me that said she was happy that I was being myself, since I am usually quite shy in groups, unless, of course, I do drugs. A very annoying guy approached me and in the end I had to make up that Sonny was my boyfriend and still he wouldn't leave me alone, but in the end everything was fine.

Outside, when we were resting or smoking, Owen sat with us a lot, but I knew it was because Pamela was around. I thought I noticed some chemistry when they met in Budapest, but I wasn't quite sure of it. I'm more sure of it now since Owen hasn't approach me once in DNA since we were back from Budapest, and that night he was often with me, Sonny, etc,. because Pamela was with us all the time. At some point in the night I saw Owen leave with a girl and then come back afterwards, he saw me and asked me why had Pamela left without saying goodbye. The whole interaction overall made me a little jealous so I tried to ignore him for the rest of the night and have fun with Sonny and Hellen. Hellen's boyfriend came around and he gave me a bite from a pill too.

Outside, at 7:30, when DNA closed, Bullet and the guys discussed opening Palace at 10:30, which was quite the spectacle since they were not going to sleep at all. Sonny suddenly said that I could sleep at his' and since I didn't want to go home (because I knew I wouldn't be able to sleep), we walked a little around town on our way to the bus. We then took the bus to his place and his dad was home so I said good morning. Sonny said I could sleep in his brother's bed, who wasn't at home. I talked to Sonny in his room and looked at the stuff in it and Sonny laughed at me because I was quite high.

I tried sleeping but I was very on drugs. I smoked a cigarette in the balcony. At 12 or so I fell asleep. I woke up at 12:30 and went outside the room and saw that the bathroom light was on. When i could see properly I saw Tony standing by the door.

He said "oh, it's you". I approached him and said "look at my eyes" and he started laughing at me. I went back to bed and slept until Sonny awoke me at 18 in the afternoon.