My Mind; A Collection

~Anxiety~

cue the meds

I wonder what it's like to have control over your breathing,

To be able to inhale with no fear of it receding.

To not feel the walls close in on you and crush you down,

Or to be able to have fun without your fears breaking you out.

To not shake and quiver, tears beading your eyes, you're terrified,

Terrified of the world, of normal life, of being someone who doesn't play it safe.

But you long to be the carefree one, the one who's not judged for acting like a mom.

I'm always prepared for the worst case scenario. I wonder what it's like to just breathe and let go.

But the thing about anxiety is that it claws at your brain and your heart and your thought train.

So no matter how hard you try, medication forcibly closing your eyes, it will always be there ready to strike. For it can see the growing fears in your eyes.

I wonder what it's like to be considered normal, to not have this demon controlling you, making you fear your inevitable vorpal.

before you get too excited I totally googled the last word

But this so accurately sums up my experience with anxiety, though everyone's will be different.

We stand with Palestine