Fragile Heart

Twenty seven

MAYAS POV
I carelessly snatched my bag and galloped out the door to meet up with Riley.
"Riley, ready for school?" I asked with a groggy tone as I slowly crawled through her window.
"Yes!" Her smile spread from ear to ear and her perfectly aligned white teeth blinded my eyes.
I wanted what she had, that constant flow of energy and positivity.
"Morning Maya." Josh grinned sweetly and smashed his soft lips onto my forehead.
There it was, he was my coffee.. The one who gave me energy and reason to get up. He made me genuinely excited to go to school,
The three of us marched towards the subway in rhythm. As we stood on the subway, Josh's arms wrapped around me and I felt special..I struggled to maintain my obnoxious smile.
As josh and I walked in to the suffocating building tangled up together and smiling, there was Logan.
He dashed over to me and kept his eyes concentrated on my cast.
"Maya, I'm so sorry." He began to apologize for something I had already forgiven him for but josh clearly hadn't. Josh unraveled his arm around me and aligned himself to Logan. Josh's hands gently pushed into Logan's chest and I felt heat rise to my cheeks.
"Josh, just stop. " I starred him in the eyes and signaled for him to lay off.
"Are you alright?" I stepped closer to Logan and looked upwards into his soft eyes.
"Maya, are you serious? He hurt you and you are concerned whether he is okay? Do you see a cast on him?" Josh's voice left me with goosebumps.
"Maybe if you weren't being such an ass and screaming at her she wouldn't of got out of your car and she would be perfectly fine." Logan grew centimeters away from Josh's face.
I took a deep breath and scrunched my eyes like I did when I was younger and my mother and father were screaming each other's heads off. I felt as if all the oxygen I contained was stolen from my lungs and I was fighting for that last breath. My body was shaking, I was a nervous mess.
"Guys, chill." Lucas stepped in between the two competing meat heads.
I started to walk away with the assurance Lucas halted the tension between the two.
"Maya!"
"What lucas?"
"I miss you."
"I miss you too." I sighed.
"How's your arm?"
"It's fine, it only hurts when I think about how I got it."
I strutted away to reunite with Riley.
"Are you okay Maya?"
"I'm fine, I just don't know how to keep Josh and Logan from tearing each other's heads off."
"They're boys, they're just being territorial."
"I guess. "
"You don't like Logan do you?"
"Of course not. My heart belongs to Josh. I just can't help it but want to help Logan . It's like we're polar opposites but we understand each other and it's just an unfamiliar feeling that feels so familiar."
"How could you possibly relate to that jackass? He's a rich boy with a big house and no problems."
"He has problems too." I whispered under my breath.
After the long day of drifting off into thoughts about Josh and Logan the school bell rang and I felt free.
I exited the building to see Logan with his leather jacket,cassette tapes, and a withering cigarette.
"Hey half pint" he smiled as I brushed past him.
I looked back and our eye contact stopped my heart.
As I was recollecting myself from Logan's tranquilizing stare I felt my head crash into someone's chest. I looked up to see Josh and my stomach felt like a tornado.
"Hey kid." He smiled
"Hey." I smiled upwards at him.
Logan was still looking at us but as soon as I leaned upwards and planted a quick peck on Josh's lips, Logan's eyes diverted to the dirt.
"Maya, you should come to jess's party tonight." Logan hollered at me from across the street.
I rolled my eyes at him and graspedJosh's hand. Logan's eyes shifted towards my grasp on Josh and he raised his eye brows and walked away.
"When is he not going to a party." Josh rolled his eyes.
"Are you going?"
"Free alcohol? Probably" he muttered.
"Just don't provoke him."
"No worries, I'll have you on my arm to leash me back."
"I don't know if I should go. If there's going to be alcohol there I shouldn't be there. I'm trying to stay out of trouble and you know that."
"I promise we will only stay for an hour and then we can leave."
"You swear?"
"I swear."
"No trouble with Logan?"
"As long as he minds his business and stays away from you."
My stomach twisted in tight, unbreakable knots and I felt dizzy thinking about tonight.
"Riley, will you come over to get ready with me? We will go together.. Please."
"I'm not going to some older kids party Maya!"
"Please. You keep me out of trouble and I really need you."
"Just don't go. That way you won't have to worry about being in trouble."
"Josh wants me too."
"So you're his property now? I thought we were feminists."
"Shut up Riley! I'm going to keep him out of trouble and you're going to keep me out of trouble." I giggled.
"Who will keep me out of trouble?" She pondered
I bursted out in an unattractive laugh and her face formed a confused expression
"What's so funny? I can be bad."
"Yeah okay kid you're the baddest." I teased
"I hate you for making me go! You know I can't let you go alone."
"And I love you for that.. Now let's find something to wear." I raised my eyebrows.
"I think it's a white out party."
"Hmm."
I shocked through my closet like I was looking for an engagement ring.
"How about this?" I held up a white crop top and some white jeans.
"Basic but sexy! I like" Riley smiled.
"Now your turn." I smiled
"I'll just wear a white lace dress."
"You're adorable." I pinched her rosy cheeks.
I heard a beep which alerted the two of us Josh was here, time for the party.
Riley grabbed onto my little hands and dug her big brown Bambi eyes into mine.
"Maya."
"Riley?"
"At these kinds of parties there will be temptations. There will be lots of boys hitting on you, Josh and Logan aren't your only worries. There will be boys trying to get you drunk and I'm going to keep you away from all of this."
"Ditto my sister friend." I teased to lighten the mood and tightly clutched her hand. I pulled her into the car with a rush of excitement.
"Go change." Josh demanded.
"No, she looks hot." Riley winked like an idiot.
"Exactly the problem. Go change."
"Josh,I can handle myself."
"I swear if I see any guys hitting on you or looking at you im going to make you wear my huge sweatshirt."
"Okay Josh." I said to shut him up.
He finally accepted defeat and drove off to Jess's.
We all jumped out of the car and I felt goosebumps began to form, The thought of tonight's mishaps gave me cold,uneasy feelings.
"Maya, glad you could make it." Logan smiled widely as soon as he saw me.
However, when he saw Josh his smile faded. His eyes wandered all over my body and he bit his lip softly and Josh looked irritated.
"Let's go get a drink." Josh tugged on my hand.
I looked over to see Logan's tongue down some barbies throat. I couldn't help but feel a paper cut like tear in my heart, insignificant but it still hurt like a bitch.
Josh grabbed his first beer and gulped it down like a savage. He continued to let the alcohol roll down his throat until he was wobbly and grumpy.
"Hey Logan." Josh smiled.
"Hey Josh?" Logan scrunched his forehead in confusion.
"Maya is mine." He slurred.
"I'm sorry, he is drunk. Come on, let's go Josh." I begged.
"No, relax. Have a beer Maya... You could use one." Josh smiled while pushing an ice cold beverage in my face.
"How chivalrous." Logan teased.
Josh walked away and my heart sunk back into its comfortable position. I followed him into a vacant bedroom.
"What's wrong?" I asked.
"I don't know."
He seemed more aware of his surroundings, a little buzzed but he was taking control of his body.
Josh grabbed onto my waist, pushed me into the bed and began to kiss me. We kissed passionately for a few minutes until he began kissing further south and I quietly began telling him
"Stop Josh, not here."
He continued to aggressively kiss me.
"Stop it Josh." I pushed him off of me and he looked hurt, rejected. His ego was deflated and his face altered to a cherry red.
"Get out of here! I didn't ask you to follow me." He screamed with hurt in his eyes.
"Josh?" My voice was weak and trembling.
"Go!" He screamed.
"I don't know what I did wrong."
Tears began to race down my face and I ran down the stairs unsure of what to do. I felt my chest burn and my stomach fill with sharp painful rocks.
"Maya? Are you okay?" Logan caught me at the bottom of the stairs.
"I don't know. No." Tears flooded my face fasted and Logan wrapped his muscular arms around me to block the party from seeing my tears. Josh walked down the stairs with remorse in his eyes as if he was about to apologize but as soon as he spotted Logan his plans changed.
"You've got to be kidding me." He muttered.
"You're an ass." Logan punched him directly in the face and Josh charged at his stomach. Everything around me spun and became cluttered, why? Because I was a mess and spread it everywhere I went. Where was Riley?
"Please stop." I screamed but no one seemed to care what I wanted.