Fair Conversation ~ The Voices In My Head's GC

happy april fools (late)

moss, grasshopper, bug, dickhead.

for all the nicknames i gave you over the years just not to mention your name, i grew more in love.

it's been so long, and yet i can't shake it off. 

you don't, probably won't reciprocate.

it hurts, but i keep relapsing,

you're like a drug i keep going back to, no matter how destructive it is to me and my body.

but i still hope.

i hold on to you foolishly,

i pray to the God i love, saying to mold you, and shape you, and make you the person for me.

i giggle to myself and dream about our wedding, 

when you say our story of when you started liking me, and how we came to be,

teenage sweethearts.

i'd wake up giddy, check my phone and see things are the same.

anytime we get so close to what i want, you'd do your stupid ritual.

it's funny, but it still hurts.

i always hoped that you'd call and say, "i've loved you all along,"

or maybe one day, you'd show up at my door,

and do and say all the things i've only dreamed of.

for i have not wanted anyone this deeply,

nor have i cared for anyone this much.

i do not want to have romance in my life,

if it is not with you.

~

i am a fool for this,

but being a fool for you is my vice.

(last year poetry is so slay)