Unspoken Hearts

Chapter 4

Siddharth Singh

What the fuck did I do? Oh God mom will kill me.

What was heck I was thinking will talking? How can I be so rude?

Just because I wanted to hurt her I made fun of her love for me. I always knew she loved me but I don't think after this she'll love me anymore.

I laughed in her face for loving me and called her a jealous person. I never noticed but now that she mentioned it, I realised that she was indeed right.

Every time I had a new girlfriend, I always forgot about her but she was always waiting for me at the other end. She was always there for me.

Fuck Singh. You messed up big this time. I've to sort this out.

I can't keep her waiting for me anymore. I was never a true best friend to her but now I'll be by her side. I'll talk to her and apologise. I'll tell her to move on from me because Amelia is not just another girl for me. I love that girl.

Defeatedly, I headed back to home.

"Did you talk with her?" As soon as I stepped in mom's voice echoed in the living room.

I sighed and slumped in the couch.

"Siddharth. Answer me." She came and stood in front of me with her hands on her hips.

I let out a breath and shook my head in agreement.

There's a guilty feeling in my chest. I wanted to replay and do things right.

"How was it? Did you guys solve your problem? Is there still any beef between you two?" Mumma's inquiry made me feel more guilty.

The heaviness of guilt and remorse began to weigh on my chest, making it difficult for me to breathe.

Why did I do that to her? She was so important to me, wasn't she? then why? Why did I ignore her? And never replied to her text? I asked myself, though my subconscious decided to complicate it further for me.

Because Amelia said she doesn't like it when you talk to other girls, or is it because you still have that silly crush on Kiara?

Crush. 

I still remember how I warned every person in her class to stay away from her because I wanted to be with her and ask her out, but I couldn't muster up the courage to do so.

 I was such a coward back then, and maybe I still am. Because no matter how shy Kiara is, she has enough courage to express her love, but I couldn't even tell her that I had a crush on her back in our teenage years.

Maybe if only I'd confessed it to her, she'd be mine now.

 But what about Amelia? I love her. Maybe it was meant to be this way.

 "Hello? I'm talking to you." Mumma snapped her fingers in front of my face and pulled me out of my reverie.

 "Yea?" I uttered in confusion, as I didn't pay any attention to her words.

 "I asked, did you guess solve it?"

 How do I tell her? How do I tell her that I messed it up? She'll kill me.

 Rather, I tried to change the topic.

 "Where's Amelia?" I asked and roamed my eyes in the living room. It must have been so weird for her to witness all this bullshit. She doesn't deserve all of this.

"She's in the guestroom."

 I arched my brows and uttered, "In the guestroom? Why?"

 "Because she's our guest?" She said it in a duh tone.