17) Changing

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☆ This destruction ☆
☆ shall be your rebirth ☆

☆ This destruction ☆☆ shall be your rebirth ☆

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✿✧ Chapter Seventeen ✧✿

This is going to be told from Bella's POV. A lot of things changed for her after the disappearance of the Cullens. I gave her a lot of character development that onyx just couldn't see. She was far too dissociated from her life to notice the changes. I will be adding a few things that will differ a lot here in the next couple chapters.

After they found me passed out in the woods, I started having nightmares. They were intense depictions of the Cullens leaving or hurting me somehow. I couldn't get a night of peace, neither could Charlie.

Onyx, on the other hand, had no trouble sleeping through it. Or maybe she just ignored it. I wasn't actually sure if she was getting much sleep these days. Ever since they left, she's been gone. It's like she's not in her body anymore.

During the first month or so after it happened, I became depressed, distant. I couldn't figure out why he was able to just leave me so easily. It hurt that he cared so little. Maybe I was forgettable to him.

After those few months of sadness, I turned to anger. I was furious at him. He obviously didn't care. He was ok with me suffering. He left me without a second thought. All the sadness I had about it seemed to boil into a blinding rage.

After I fell into a pit of depression, my attendance got bad. At first, I missed days because I was too miserable to get up. Then, later on, I started missing school because I hated seeing my old friend smiling and laughing. It was like a cruel reminder of my misery.

I hated seeing the empty table where they used to sit. I hated being in the classes that I used to have with them, the empty seats reminding me of their absence.

It was easier to be angry. It was easier to hate everyone. I started to become rebellious. It was like a defence mechanism. Everytime things got bad I did something that made me feel something again.

I enjoyed the small rebellious acts that came after a few months. I got on a motorcycle with a stranger, rode a bike that me and Jacob fixed up, and I slapped a werewolf in the face. That last one didn't go so well as you might imagine.

Jacob and I had gotten closer when I'd brought bikes over to him to fix together. I knew he had a thing for me. He was pretty open to flirting with me. Jacob had a way of making me feel better. I was slowly catching feelings for him.

It was easier to deal with the sadness when he was there. I could breath around him. Like he filled the hole that Edward had left. I felt like I was finally healing.

I ended up spending a lot of my time with him on the Res. If I wasn't with him, I was with his cousin Nari. She helped us fix up the bikes and didn't mind the awkward tension between us. She was a little intimidating at times, but we got on well.

Things were getting better. That was until my sister disappeared. She just vanished one day in late December. My dad and I searched for her, leading search teams throughout Forks and the surrounding forests. Though, it never payed off. We never found her.

There wasn't much we could do. She was an adult so she couldn've just left. Charlie held onto some hope that she'd just left town. It was all that kept him from breaking down. I wished for him to be right, but it just didn't seem likely.

After a month, we stopped searching. It was very likely that she was dead. It hurt to think that my sister could have been murdered by some sicko. Or maybe she killed herself, but that wasn't much better.

Five weeks after she'd disappeared, I walked into the woods. I wanted so badly to know if she was still out there. I walked all the way to that meadow that I layed in with Edward all that time ago. The grass had died due to the winter weather. It looked bleak without the patches of wild flowers it once held.

I looked across the field and was surprised to see Laurent. He was dressed in a dark suit that almost blended into his skin. He looked the same as the last time I'd seen him.

"Bella"

"Laurent."

"You seem pleased to see me."

I stared at him for a moment. Was I happy about his appearance? Something deep in my chest said I was, that it meant that they'd come back and protect me. Then again, I knew they wouldn't. Maybe it just made me mad that he reminded me of them. He was a vampire and not a kind one. The only spark of joy he brought me was via the danger of his nearness.

"I didn't expect to find you here... in the middle of the woods... alone."

His words were ominous. I didn't know how to respond to them. He seemed to realize that and continued.

"I went to visit the Cullens, but their house was empty. I'm siprised they left you behind. Weren't you sort of a... pet of theirs?"

It was like a punch to the gut. A gaping reminder that I wasn't good enough to keep around. I opened my mouth to reply but my words got lost before they were spoken.

"I... Uh- ya. You could say that," I stumbled on the words.

"That must hurt. That they abandoned you. I believe you deserve much better than that. The way I see it, your blood make you special. You're a delicacy to vampires."

"Why are you here," I asked.

"Victoria asked me to keep an eye on you. She has plans for you. Though, the wolves are keeping her a little occupied right now."

"I'm under their protection. The wolves and the Cullens."

"The where are they? I haven't seen the Cullens at all. How much could you mean to him if he left you here unprotected? As for those mutts, they're too busy keeping their treaty from crumbling. Victoria stirred the pot with her recent actions and they're trying to protect there little contract. It's ironic in a way."

What had she done? Was it because of her diet? I know that the Cullens agreed to not kill anyone in Forks. But does that apply to other vampires then? I'm honestly not as informed about this stuff as I should be.

"What did she do?"

"That's none of your concern. Now, I must go. I can't stay here when the wolves have been hot on our trail. Maybe we'll see each other again."

Before I could respond he was gone. I wondered where he was going. Did they have a safe spot or something? I looked into the forest in question.

A/n- I changed a couple parts of this after your suggestions. I honestly went into this with no idea what I was doing. I tried my best to cover everything that Bella experienced but I found it difficult.

I think I'll do one more chapter that fully Bella's POV. I want to add more to her relationship with Jacob. I also want to write something that's less vague. The beginning felt rather shallow.

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