Change My Mind

21 - Undercover under covers

I had no sense of time. We could have been on the couch for an hour or seven hours, it was just all-consuming and time wasn't relevant. Eventually I suggested we go to the bedroom, and he agreed. His height and my couch didn't exactly match in measurements, so he must have been a little uncomfortable lying squished together. He got up and stretched his body, before he held his hand out for mine. When I got up, he put his arms around me and I wrapped my arms around his neck. He put his hands under my bottom, and lifted me up to wrap my legs around his waist. Then he carried me into the bedroom and plopped me down on the bed. I giggled as I fell down on my back with him standing over me. He bent down and ran his finger down along my sternum and down to my waist. He hooked his finger into the waistband of my jeans and looked up at me to check if he was allowed to take my jeans off. I nodded and let him unbutton my jeans and pull them off me, leaving me in my panties. He looked down at me and took a deep breath. I blushed under his gaze, but the dimmed lighting of the bedroom covered my rosy cheeks. I sat up on the edge of the bed in front of him and put my hands on his belt, checking if he was okay with me opening it. He bit the inside of his cheek and nodded. I unbuckled his belt and helped him out of his jeans. Then I scooted backwards on the bed and made room for him to come lay down next to me. 

We lay on our sides, facing each other with just a few inches between us. The heat from his skin radiated towards me, and I wished he had been there next to me all winter when my heating wasn't working. He let his hand run along the curve of my hip, waist and ribs until it landed at the nape of my neck. He gently pulled me towards him and our lips met in a passionate kiss. I pressed myself tightly against him, savouring the feeling of his warm, muscular chest against me. I placed my hand on his back, and stroked it, letting my palm glide over the muscles on his back. He shivered when I let my nails run over his skin and a small moan escaped into our kiss. His hand travelled to my ass, which he squeezed and rubbed while he pressed my hips against his, his erection poking me. 

"There's definitely potential. He's quite big," Liv's unwelcomed words echoed in my head. 

I did my best to push it aside and focus on what was happening here and now. Yes, Liv had had drunken sex with him, and it had been terrible, but this was different. We were different. Nothing he was doing felt wrong, very much on the contrary. The way he kissed me and his gentle touch was absolutely right. He cupped my breast and dipped his head down to kiss it, letting his flattened tongue run over my nipple, making me moan softly. I felt an ache building in my core, a familiar feeling of needing to be touched. 

I started wondering if he had touched Liv like this. If he had licked her skin and placed hundreds of kisses on her, gently licking and sucking in some areas. I abruptly rolled onto my back, put both hands on my forehead and took a deep breath. 

"What's wrong? Did I hurt you?" Harry asked nervously. He raised up on his elbow and looked at me. I turned to look at him, and there was nothing but softness in his eyes. I could tell him a lie and get on with it, or I could be honest and tell him where my mind had gone.

I moved my hands from my forehead. "Did you and Liv do these things?" I asked, biting my lip as I waited for him to answer me. 

He tilted his head slightly and furrowed his brows. "El, it was a huge, drunken mistake. It was nothing like this."

"But did you? Did you kiss and touch her like this?" I insisted and looked at him. 

He took a deep breath and shrugged. "I was drunk out of my mind. I don't remember much. Only that it was bad, I couldn't perform, and I more or less passed out during. When I woke in the morning I rushed out of the house and home. I was ashamed of myself and the fact that I had let it go that far."

"I don't want to be someone you regret," I said and felt an uncomfortable pressure of a lump in my throat, like I could burst into tears. 

"I could never regret you. Just like I can't forget about you. You're in my head constantly. I don't want to fuck this up, so if I'm about to, can you tell me so?" He rested his hand on my hip.