Change My Mind

37 - Taming the beast

Niall's pov

I saw El and Harry off, waving at them as they drove away for a day together. It seemed like the right thing for them to do. Things were so awkward with Liv, and if El just went into it with Liv, there was a risk of it all blowing up in her face. Liv was very upset, and she would most likely go for the jugular, thirsty for blood and for El to know how wrongly she had treated her. I had offered to try and speak to her, and for some reason I seemed to think that was a good idea. In all of this, I was the only one who didn't have anything to lose. Harry and El were easily played against each other, both wanting to protect each other, and they would both step away from the best thing that had ever happened to either of them, to make sure the other part was unharmed. 

I went over to Liv's place and knocked on the door. There was no way of knowing what I would be met by, but I sure as hell hoped she had kept her vow of sobriety. It had worried me that she might be drinking again to calm her nerves. I stood for a while and waited, before Aiden opened the door and looked at me with a sleepy look on his face.

"Hey," he said and looked around me to see if anyone else was there. When he determined I was alone, he opened the door further and let me in. "Where are the others?" 

"I sent Elowen and Harry off on an excursion, so I could have a calm talk with Liv," I answered honestly. There was no point in keeping anymore secrets, they only caused harm and pain. 

"Hm..." Aiden seemed unimpressed. "Liv is in her room. She refuses to come out. Remember to knock or she'll bite your head off," he obviously spoke from experience. 

I nodded and walked up to where Liv's room was, the room I had stayed in with Harry until the night before. I softly knocked on the door. "Liv? Can I come in?" I said, not too loudly, but loud enough for her to hear me. I put on my most assertive tone, hoping she wouldn't just tell me to fuck off. 

"Come in," she said after a moment's silence. She had probably been contemplating whether to invite me in or to send me to hell or whatever place she saw the most fitting. I opened the door to her bedroom and entered the very dimly lit room. She had drawn all the curtains except for one. She was sitting on the window sill, her back against the window frame, looking out over the backyard. I crossed the room carefully and placed myself on the window sill opposite from her. "What are you doing here?" She asked and looked at me with tired, sad eyes. She had dark circles around her eyes and it was evident she had had a rough night. 

"I wanted to check on you. To see how you are doing," I said and kept my eyes fixed on her face. I partly already knew how she was going to answer me, but I braced myself with the patience of a saint. 

She scoffed and leaned her chin against her knees. "How do you think I am doing?" She asked in a tone she usually didn't use with any of us. "Was I never supposed to know?" 

I tilted my head and looked questioningly at her. "Never supposed to know what?" 

"That they are screwing behind my back! Was I supposed to walk around and think that he was just taking his time to really get to know me, but he was already fucking around with her, because she gave it away?" Her voice cracked when she spoke, making me feel really bad for her. 

"Are you in love with Harry?" I asked with as much warmth as I could muster. 

She shrugged and rubbed her face. "I don't know. Maybe? It's hard to tell. He's a complicated guy." 

I grimaced and shook my head. "He's actually not complicated at all, Liv." I looked out the window and caught sight of Aiden working out on the dock. "And to my knowledge he has been honest about his feelings towards you? He told you he was your friend, right?"