Love is half

35

"They don't need to come to airport."

This is first time Taehyung talking to him this week other than the mention of passports and times. After the tension and silence, now they are on their way to airport and he is sitting in Taehyung's car in the backseat as away as he can get from him, Yoongi and Jimin behind them on their car with Jungkooks luggage since Taehyungs is packed with his own.

It doesn't process Jungkook fast enough as to why Taehyung is questioning the other car behind them, this would be last time Jungkook will be seeing his two hyungs and doesn't know when he will see them again, of course they would be here to drop him off.

"I don't know when I will see them again." That's all Jungkook replies with, keeping his voice firm as he is looking away from avoiding Taehyungs gaze. He hasn't looked at the older whole time, doesn't know what he is wearing, doesn't know if his blond hair is combed or not. Its like the presence of Taehyung is a spiral that just feels too dreading in his mind. It's almost as if he could still hear his words, screams and shouts spiraling his head, buzzing his ears with faint ringing.

Because nobody has ever shouted at him, Taehyung was first one to do so, and Jungkook doesn't know why he let him do it.

But he is sure he never wants to see him like that around him ever again.

"do they know?"

"About what?"

"That day." Oh. That day. Jungkook didn't need Taehyung to explain what he is referring to. As Jungkook shakes his head, he can spot everything, somewhere in his heart where it really impacted him, the scowl on Taehyungs face, the anger- the smoke, and most of it, his words. Its not easy to forget. They are drilled in his mind.

Jungkook slowly shakes his head as if he is wondering why he haven't told anyone. Not even Yoongi. Its like a note in little box where no one would find out except for Taehyung and himself. Maybe he just doesn't want to use Taehyungs weak moment against him. That day, Taehyung wasn't sane. He was someone else.

"no."

Taehyung is quiet, the car hms softly in the background and the tension is high yet nobody wants to talk about what happened. When its too quiet, the younger slowly accepts to himself it would not be mentioned, he just looks down and caresses the little spot on his wrist, a burn cigarette mark, a subject almost forbidden to speak of.

He wonders if there will be more spots on his skin in future, in his heart.

Will he even come back to this city with the same way he is leaving, body packed with skin and muscle, shiny hair and a heart which is weak yet he can still handle it. He wonders how many things about himself will change when he will be back.

"I feel angry sometimes." When Taehyung says this after a while, the sudden tension of the room shifts, fills with a more heavy feeling dread that is clearly meant to stay in the dark. That much Jungkook could tell by the tone of his voice, guilty, "towards everything, anyone. You."