Lu Lu Moon-Demon slayer-Mixed au, Kokuzan

Care?(5)

🎀 私 愛 コクザン 🎀

Muzans in his emo phase 😇

Tw:
Angst (obv)
Cigarettes
Drugs
Alcohol
Gore
SH (Self-Harm)

˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚
Setting: H!M's bedroom
1st person pov: Muzan <3
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I looked around for a little bit before my eyes settled on the pack of Cigarettes that I got...for purposes.

I opened the pack and grabbed one out I was heavily deciding on if I should light it or not, but I eventually decided to, after all...they're bad for your health...that's why I bought them anyways...I hate my life.

I lit the cigarette and inhaled its wrapped toxins. I pulled the cigarette out of my mouth and blew out a puff of smoke. I don't need anyone. I can go on my own. Not Michikatsu, not anyone.

Nobody will ever make me step this low. Never again. I hate everyone now, I thought he was my only hope in this world, but he kept a secret from me...who knows if he isn't doing something behind my back..?

I hate...No. I don't hate Michikatsu. It's complicated....even for me...

I don't hate anyone actually...It's not them that I hate, is it? No. I hate myself. I HATE MYSELF.

I CANT DO ANYTHING CORRECTLY ITS MY FAULT. ALL MY FAULT.

I HATE MYSELF

I HATE MYSELF

I HATE MYSELF

...Someone should just put me off this planet. A mistake like me doesn't deserve to live. I'll start it maybe...

Time skip: setting: bathroom: pov: 1

I looked at myself in the mirror. I'm hideous, disgusting... I walked back to my bedroom and grabbed a box from underneath my bed. It had a slicky velvet coat. I opened the box and took out its contents.

It was a knife. I knife that is a family heirloom. It's millennials old and in good condition. Its main base is sliver plated added gold with rubys lodged into it.

I pledged to never use it until I needed it for "self-defense" but this is self defense...against myself.

I lined the knife up to my wrist and pressed down. It hurt like hell...I would compare it to stabbing, put its the same thing...

"AAA...Ha! C-Calm d-down M-Muzan... Y-You're alright...Just a f-few mo-more c-cuts...29..."

3rd person pov: :D
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He continued cutting, every time he he cut he went deeper he could almost he his bones. Despite his screams and conditions, he continued cutting. No mater how loud he screamed he could get himself to stop...the pain....the pain was addicting to him. It's like never before, it hurts but the after math of the cut stings, every little moment that he shudders it feels like heaven....he loved the sight of his blood everywhere, he deserved it after all...

"AAA! AA! F-FUCK...." Muzan yelled out in pain. But he continued anywas.

"J-Just....1-18...AAAAA!"

He screamed louder and louder and louder with every cut. He had tears streaming down his face, but this is what he deserved anyways...

After small amount of time he finally put the knife down. His hands were shaking and his vision was going blury, his body felt numb. He couldn't walk back to his bedroom properly after how much blood he lost. 15 cuts on both of his arms makes 30. He closed his eyes as he grabbed bandges and wrapped his arms.