Heard
Miara was pacing back and forth in her room. Sa lahat ng mga tawag at messages na natanggap niya, wala siyang may sinagot.
Pinapangunahan na siya ng takot at pangamba. She doesn't know where to run to... or whom... and it's a suffocating feeling—to know that you don't have anyone to depend on.
She's sure that Ali and Isa knows. Pero ano ang maitutulong ng dalawa sa kaniya? She's not even sure if the two still wants anything to do with her. Baka nandidiri na ang dalawa sa kaniya.
She knows that Ali and Isa look up to her. Nagbibiruan man sila at nagtutuksuhan, alam ni Miara na siya ang tinitingalang "ate" ng dalawa. Pero ngayon... malakas ang kutob niya na ayaw na ng dalawa sa kaniya.
Hindi niya binasa ang mga messages nila. Natatakot siya sa mababasa niya. She doesn't want to read their goodbyes yet.
The best that she could think of is to turn her phone off, so that's what she did.
Nang mapagod sa pabalik-balik ay naupo siya sa gilid ng kama. She felt energized when she woke up. But now... she just wants to sleep again and never wake up.
Hindi niya na talaga alam ang gagawin.
She can't run to her own mother. Alam niyang mas mapapahamak siya kung hihingi siya ng tulong sa ina niya. And it would be a surprise if her mother is still not aware. Malakas din ang kutob niya na papunta na rito ang ina niya para lang pangaralan siya.
Primo. Her mind suggested.
Napapikit na lang siya at napahikbi. She can't believe that everything's crumbling down again.
Noon, parang nasira ang mundo niya pero wala siyang pakialam. Alam niyang makakabangon siya. Pero ngayon... hindi niya na alam... because unlike before, she's contented with the world she's living in... but it's being taken away again.
Napahawak siya sa dibdib, hindi na makahinga. Sumasakit iyon at napasigaw na lang siya dahil sa pinaghalong sakit, inis, at galit.
She clenched her fist while her other hand gripped the bed sheet. Kailangan niya ng mahahawakan. She's too vulnerable and weak.
"Miara!" Napaigtad siya nang marinig ang isang pamilyar na boses.
Isang salita lang at kilala niya na kung sino ang dumating. She doesn't have to see the owner of the voice to know that it's her mother.
"Miara!" Sigaw ulit nito.
She wanted to hide under the blanket and pretend that she's asleep. But she also knows that the later she comes out of her room, the more trouble she will face.
Kahit nanghihina ay pinilit niyang tumayo. She had to hold on to the wall just to support herself. Ngunit bago pa siya makalabas ay pumasok na ang ina niya sa kaniyang silid.
"Lintek ka talaga!"
Both her mind and cheek felt numbed in just a split second. Umikot ang pangingin niya at natumba na. It's either her knees really couldn't take it or the impact from her mother's slap was really forceful.
But either way, it rendered her speechless. Nanigas ang kalooban niya at parang nawala ang sakit. And not because she's no longer in pain. But because she can no longer feel anything.
It's like she doesn't exist at all. She's numb all over.
Her mother was screaming words, but her mind couldn't register any of it. Tulala niya lang itong tinitigan. She didn't even bother standing up.
Tinitigan niya lang ang sariling ina at hinayaan na duro-duroin siya nito.
She tried to understand at least a sentence from her long, earful speech but couldn't. The only thing that she can register is the ringing and vibrating sound in her ear.
BINABASA MO ANG
Miara's Mistakes
Romanspov: it's 2020 and you went inside the wrong car and got stuck in a lock down with a stranger *** Miara met Primo because of a mistake. Will this chance encounter lead to another regrettable mistake, or will this prompt her to reconsider how she per...
