Miara's Mistakes

(154) August 9, 2020

Chance

Miara was mindlessly walking in the midst of the crowded market. Katatapos niya lang magsimba at ngayon ay namamalengke na. Tapos niya nang bilhin ang mga karne at seafood at ngayon ay mga prutas at gulay naman.

Biglang napatili si Miara nang may humablot sa braso niya. She was pulled to the side and it was then when she saw a guy who was carrying two sacks of rice on his shoulder yet his eyes were on his phone. Hindi ito nakatingin sa daanan at muntik nang mabunggo si Miara.

Miara turned to the person who pulled her. Gusto niyang magpasalamat dahil kung hindi ay baka nakahiga na siya ngayon sa basang sahig. Napaawang na lang ang mga labi niya nang makita kung sino iyon.

"Primo," she called. Ayos naman ang kaniyang boses pero bigla na lang siyang namamaos.

The person who has been bugging her mind is now in front of her. Hindi siya maayos na nakatulog kagabi dahil nagpaulit-ulit lang sa isipan niya ang mga sinabi ni Primo sa kaniya. Pati noong nasa misa at noong namimili ng mga isda kanina ay si Primo pa rin ang laman ng isipan niya.

If only she can brush this guy off her head, she would. And if only she could run away from him, she would. But she doesn't want to. Even though staying away from Primo is a tempting option, she won't do it.

Malaki ang respeto at utang na loob niya sa lalaki. To run away and pretend that he didn't just bare his feelings to her would be an immature thing to do. Kung iyon nga ang gagawin niya ay hindi siya karapat-dapat na magustuhan ng lalaki.

Primo deserves someone respectable too. Just like the respectable man that he is... someone brilliant and kind and sweet... someone who can balance his seriousness... someone who's brave enough to joke around during times he seems unsociable... someone who doesn't have a dirt on her name...

"Miara... are you okay?"

Napalunok at nag-iwas ng tingin si Miara nang mapansin na nakasimangot na pala siya. Nakita siguro iyon ng lalaki kaya biglang nag-alala.

She glanced at him and saw Primo looking at her intently. They're in the middle of a chaotic and loud crowd yet here they are, just standing in front of each other.

"I wasn't following you around... I saw you walking and you almost hit that guy who was carrying two sacks of rice!" He sounded desperate. It was as if he really wants to prove that they met by coincidence.

Tumango si Miara. Alam niyang hindi siya nito sinusundan.

"Am I bothering you? I can leave," he smiled, but Miara knew that it was a forced one. It was an awkward and insincere one. Alam niyang ayaw nitong ngumiti pero pinilit pa rin.

Him stuttering when he speaks is not... him... hindi siya nauutal. He would rather stay silent than utter words he's unsure of. Primo may not be talkative but when he does, he does it confidently. He's also not the type who forces a smile. Minsan lang siya nakangiti nang todo pero alam niyang hindi iyon pinilit.

Pero ngayon... hindi na alam ni Miara. He doesn't seem to be his usual self. Miara would rather face the stoic Primo than this one.

"Hindi... pasensya... nagulat lang ako..."

Nilibot ni Miara ang mga mata at napagtanto na hindi angkop ang kinaroroonan nila sa kung ano man ang dapat nilang pag-usapan. Against her better judgment, she held his wrist and pulled him out.

Sabay silang napasinghal nang makalabas na sa open air. Napatingin si Miara sa lalaki ngunit nakayuko ito at ang mga mata ay nasa kamay nito na hawak-hawak naman ni Miara.

Miara suddenly forgot that she was holding his hand. Mabilis na binitawan ni Miara ang kamay ng lalaki at napaupo na lang sa bench.

Primo sat beside her and they were enveloped by silence. Silang dalawa lang ang tahimik ngunit ang paligid naman nila ay hindi.