Again In Neverland

BONUS CHAPTER

A/N: Here it is guys! A bonus chapter of the conversation between Lilith and Jonathan when Peter was busy talking to Wendi :)
Enjoy!

LIL'S POV:

As the stampede of people rushed towards Peter and I, we both quickly stepped to the side to avoid being trampled. The amount of sheer enthusiasm to go though with this rescue mission is really overwhelming.

I mean, none of them are really doing it for me. Aeden Greydust's army of fairy guards was sent from the Queen to rescue Alina, and the Piccaninny simply couldn't refuse a fight. OH! I've recently learned that the Piccanniny aren't the only tribe of natives on Neverland! Apparently, there are three or four other tribes who have dispersed themselves around the island.

One tribe lives up in the Snowy Mountains (which is just beyond the Piccaninny camp and is whom the Piccaninny often trade with); another tribe lives so far North on the island, that there are stories of how their tribe followed a light spirit (which is apparently different than a fairy) to the end of the island, and before they fell off the edge the spirit returned to it's original position in the sky to act as a guide, so that they could always find their way back home; and the last tribe, the most vicious of them all, take up residence at the base of Crocodile Creek and Cannibal Cove - I don't have to explain how the cove got it's name...

But anyway, like I was saying, everybody is here to save Alina. And that's great - it's exactly what we need - but, I can't help but feel disappointed. I should be able to save her by myself! I'm the Kulethe, right? I'm supposed to be able to defeat any foe and do most anything, and yet all I've managed to do is get my fairy into trouble, and now risk the lives of all these people/fairies.

What kind of hero allows themselves to even get into this type of mess?

I don't know what's going to happen tonight. I don't know who's going to get hurt, or if we'll find that mermaid, or if we'll defeat the pirates -- but I do know one thing. We will save Alina.

Just thinking about the possibilities of tonight make me nervous. As I move out of the way of all these people, I feel like my center of balance is off. I nearly topple over but luckily I manage to get a glimpse of Jonathan appearing out of thin air and stopping me from falling. In the process of doing so, he walks us a bit off the trail and under a tree with large branches.

"You alright?" He asks as he puts the back of his hand to my forehead, "You feel kind of warm, like you're sick or something. Lil... are you still feeling bad? Because if you are then we need to get you back to the treehouse immediately."
"No!" I quickly say, blinking hard a few times to stop the spinning in my head, "I'm fine. I don't need to go back."

Jonathan removes his hand and leans it against the tree, "You sure don't seem fine."
"What do you mean?"
"You're just... off. You're all pasty, and you look like you're about to spew all over the place, and not to mention the fact that you literally passed out a few hours ago."
"That was almost twenty-four hours ago..." I defend.
"It doesn't matter," He continues to argue, "I still don't think you seem well enough to be here."
I try to brush it off, "I'm really alright. And it doesn't matter about me anyway, we're here for Alina."

I say that I'm fine but honestly, I don't know what's going on. The more that people mention it, the more I begin to realize that something is a bit up. These heat spells and dizzy flashes are the symptoms of serious sicknesses - like the flu or maybe something else - but I can't exactly prescribe myself a glass of vitamins and a good night's rest. Not with everything that's going on. The main thing to focus on is Alina, and then on myself later.

"If you say so." Jonathan sighs, not totally convinced.
I scratch my ribcage for a moment as the silence hangs heavy between us. I shift my feet, "Well, thanks for saving me from toppling over but, I should get going." I point a thumb over my shoulder, "Gotta lead an army, and all."

I go to take a step away but Jonathan protests.
"Lil, wait. Stop."
"I have to go, Jonathan. We can talk later-"
"You have to stop doing this! I... I can't handle it any more!"
I pause, "Stop doing what?"
"This," He gestures between the two of us, "Us."
"Us?"
"Yes, us! Every time I want to talk to you, every time I try to start a serious conversation with you, you have to leave." He crosses his arms, "Everybody else is more important than me."

I shake my head, "That's not true. You're just as important to me."
"Then why are you avoiding me?"
"I'm not avoiding you."
"Yes you are!" He raises his voice, "I can't make you stand still for more than two seconds! It's 'Peter this' or 'Alina that' or 'Lost Boys' there. There's never a time in your popular schedule for me!"
I shrug and rake a hand through my pulled back hair, "I don't know what you want me to say, Jonathan! Yes, I'm busy. There's a lot going on, in case you haven't noticed! I'm doing my best to juggle everything Jonathan but," I throw my hands out to my sides, "I'm not perfect, okay? I can't do everything! I try but I just... I can't. There's only so much of me."

He rubs his eyes, "I'm not asking for much, Lilith. It just feels like you don't even bother to spare a second for me anymore."
I look down at my dirty, bare feet, "I'm sorry."
"I need to know something. I need to know... what happened between us? Back in Ireland, I thought things were going... you know... good. We had fun. I showed you around. And then we ended up here and everything that we had going, everything between us just sort of... vanished."
I bit my lip and kept my head down. Quite honestly, I was ashamed of myself. It was true. I'd started ditching him once we got here. I've just been so caught up in everything else that it's just... it's gotten... complicated.

"So tell me, was I crazy? Did you not feel something for me? Because it sure as hell felt like it."
I close my eyes and pinch the bridge of my nose, "Jonathan, I can't-"
"No!" He shouts, "You cannot do this to me anymore! It's not fair, Lil. It's driving me crazy. Do you have any idea what it's like to feel something for someone, and watch them dump you aside for someone else? Do you have the slightest clue what it's like to feel completely cut off and distanced from someone you deeply care about?"
"I know-"
"You don't know!" He adjusts his crooked glasses and wipes his cheeks, "You couldn't know. Because it's not happening to you."

I don't respond right away. I feel sick to my stomach. Jonathan is so right about everything he's said but I can't bring myself to say it. I can't say what I know he wants me to say.

"Jonathan," I breathe as I take a step towards him and put my hands on his shoulders, "You mean so much more to me than you could ever imagine."
He gives a small, unconvincing laugh, "But it's not enough to make you love me."

I step away from him, fury tears blurring my eyes and a new nausea billowing in my throat, "How can you say that to me? With everything going on right now, with what we're about to go in to, that's what you ask me?"
He pulls at his hair, "It's all I ever think about!" But then he pauses, "In case you haven't alreqdy guessed it, I am desperately in love with you, Lil. And I can't tell what you feel. I can't get any reading on you, because all you ever do is run away from me. But - I guess that's a sign all on it's own."
He gives me one last, disappointed look, and turns his back to me - starting to walk back into the forest.
"That is not what it means!" I rapidly respond.

He keeps walking. I feel anger boiling inside me, with a mixture of guilt. I've really screwed things up. I've screwed everything up.

"Jonathan!" I yell, wiping at tears on my face. He doesn't turn around. He doesn't stop.
"Jonathan!"

I watch in anguish as his silhouette disappears into the blackness of the forest. Even with a full moon, the darkness is suffocating and it quickly swallows Jonathan whole. After what feels like a life time of my standing there, mulling over what happened, Peter clears his throat behind me.

"Lilith? Are you ready to go? They're waiting for us."
Taking a deep breath, I wipe away any dried tears on my cheeks and swallow down the scream in my throat. I push away the burning sensation I'm feeling in my chest, that makes me want to double over and squeal, and put on a brave face.

I turn to Peter and take my sword from my hip, "I'm ready."

A/N PART 2: Hey lovelies well I hope you enjoyed! Regular chapter will be posted later in the week :)
BTW I have recently created/ been given some AMAZING fanart that I will be uploading as chapter-cover- displays! The image of Peter and Lil on this chapter is from the wonderful @crazyel5
and I just manipulated it :)
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