Heartless Vasiliev

Chapter Eight

Nathaniel

Moving on was harder than I expected. Hindi ko na alam kung ilang araw o linggo ang lumipas mula nang maghiwalay kami ni Celeste. I think it's been over a month? I'm not sure.

I've been living like a robot since then. I'd wake up in the morning, go straight to my art studio, mope, go out to buy stuffs, then go back home. Araw-araw kong iniisip si Celeste.

Dumaan ako noon sa trabaho niya, pero hindi ko siya nakita. I figured that she must've left. I wanted to give her space so she could clear her mind, pero naiisip ko rin baka mas magandang hayaan ko na lang. Wala na rin naman akong magagawa kung ayaw na talaga niya.

I tried my very best to enjoy everything and get back in shape. May mga upcoming art exhibit ako, pero tuwing gumagawa ako ng bagong obra, wala akong maramdaman sa mga ito. The canvas might be colorful, but it's lifeless.

Today, my father invited me for lunch. I met up with them in a private restaurant, together with Mom and kuya Rad. Ngayon na lang din kami magkikita.

"Where's Celeste, anak?" Mom asked.

"Let's not take about her, please?"

"Break na po sila," it was kuya who answered.

"I'm sorry, dear," Mom said in a comforting tone.

"Siguro natauhan na at na-realize na wala siyang magandang future kasama ka," Dad retaliated.

"Is this why you invited me? Para ipamukha ang favoritism, Dad?"

He cleared his throat. "No. I've been talking to my lawyer at inaayos ko na ang hati ng mga ari-arian ko."

Natahimik ang lamesa namin. I was the one who asked a question. "Are you dying?"

"Nathaniel!" inis na sambit ni Mommy.

Dad was glaring at me before he spoke. "Your Mom and I are planning to go back to Russia to live there. Knowing you two, alam kong ayaw ninyong sumama. Kaysa ibenta ko ang mga maiiwan, hahatiin ko na lang sa inyong magkapatid. Konrad will get the company. As for you, Nathaniel, ikaw ang magmamay-ari ng bahay natin. You can stop living in your tiny apartment and move back home."

"When are you leaving, Dad?" tanong ni Kuya.

"Hindi kami aalis kaagad. Maybe in a year or two."

Iyon lamang ang napag-usapan namin. Nauna ring umalis ang mga magulang namin kaya naiwan kami ni kuya. It was a bit awkward for some reason, but he initiated the conversation.

"So, how's life?" he asked.

I just shrugged. "Same as before, minus Celeste."

"Miss mo?"

"Sobra, kuya."

"You can drop by my house later. Inom tayo, oh!"

Tumawa ako. "You know I don't drink that much."

"Minsan lang. Brother to brother. Look, I know you're struggling. Gusto ko lang sanang ipakita sa 'yo na nandito lang sa likod mo palagi ang kuya mo. We haven't had the best relationship, 'Tan. Gusto kong kahit ngayon man lang, ipakita kong nandito ako para sa'yo. What do you say?"

I stared at him for a few minutes before finally nodding. "Sige, kuya. Puntahan na lang kita mamaya sa bahay mo."

Tinapik niya ang balikat ko. "See you later. Sige na, bibili pa ako ng grocery."

With that, he left me in the restaurant. I went back home right after. Hinintay ko na lang na lumipas ang ilang oras bago nag-text kay kuya na pupuntahan ko siya.

I got to his place about ten minutes later using my car. I was knocking pero walang sumasagot kaya pinapasok ko na lang ang sarili ko. His house seemed empty, so I continued looking around. Nang makalapit ako sa kwarto niya, I heard a familiar's voice.

"Rad, bilisan mo pa," a woman pleaded. I memorized that voice from the depth of my heart.

I heard kuya laughing. "Calm down, darling. We can do this all day."

I heard the woman call his name and this time, I'm sure it was her. I kicked the door open and saw Celeste straddling kuya Rad. She had her hands on his shoulder while kuya's hands were on her waist and bottom. As our eyes met, her face turned pale. She hurriedly got off of kuya and started dressing herself. Kuya's face was painted with a cocky smile. Gago, ang puta!

Celeste called me but I stormed out of the room as quickly as I could. My heart is clenching in pain and it feels like my lungs aren't working as well. I heard Celeste's voice calling me, pleading. As I walked out of the house, my vision became blurry.

'Tang ina, ang sakit. Bakit 'yong kuya ko pa?

"Love, wait!" Celeste yelled as she caught up with me. She held my hand and tried to stop me. "Please, Nathaniel, huwag kang magalit."

That's it, I snapped. "Fuck it, Celeste! Paanong hindi ako magagalit? You were fucking my brother!"

"I can explain. Please, makinig ka."

"She's right, Nathan," Kuya Konrad said from behind. "Makinig ka sa girlfriend mo."

I never listened to them. I walked out and left. Celeste continued to chase me and eventually, she caught up. I stopped myself from yelling at her.

"Nathan, please let me explain."

"What is there to explain, huh? I caught you fucking my brother!" Napaatras siya nang sumigaw ako. "You said you needed time and space, that's why I let you leave even when I was devastated. Why-" my voice cracked at this point. "Why would you use that time to cheat on me!"

"It's not cheating! We're not together. It's not cheating if we broke up," she said, but not to me. It's more like she's saying that to comfort herself. "Hindi ako manloloko, Nathan."

"Manloloko ka na, Celeste. Huwag ka nang maging sinungaling."

I was about to leave again but kuya was able to get a grip on my arm. I simply brushed him off. He was about to hold me when I yelled at him.

"Ano?! Kaya mo ba ako pinapunta rito para ipamukha mong nagpapatira sa 'yo 'yong ex ko?"

"Nathan!" Celeste yelled so I turned to her. "Ano, mas masarap si kuya? Mas magaling siya?!"

She slapped me. "I'm not like that!"

I gripped her jaw. "You were fucking him! Kung hindi pa ako dumating, malamang sinisigaw mo pa rin kung gaano siya kasarap!"

She cried and kuya went to her rescue. He pushed me and hugged her. What a disgusting view.

"Nathaniel, you do not treat a woman like that!" he lectured me.

"You don't fuck your brother's ex and act like you're concerned!"

"Leave!" Kuya yelled.

I was about to turn my back against them, but before I left, hinarap ko sila. "You think you two are perfect for each other? Kuya, ilang taon kami ni Celeste pero nagawa niyang itapon ang lahat ng 'yon. Sa tingin mo talaga magiging loyal siya? Wala ngang foundation 'yang relayson ninyo kung hindi libog! And Celeste, you know my brother. Hindi 'yan nagtatagal sa isang babae. In a matter of time, magsasawa na 'yan sa 'yo, and you will just be the whore that warms his bed."

"Leave, Nathaniel!"