Nathaniel
I lost consciousness after the confrontation. I woke up feeling dizzy and my mind is still in a mess. Katabi ko so Mommy pero wala si Dad at Celeste.
“Mom,” I weakly whispered.
“Nate, how are you?”
“Masakit ulo ko. Mom, totoo ba ’yong sinabi ni Dad? Please, tell me na sinasabi lang nila ’yon para gantihan ako. Konrad is alive, right?”
Mukhang nanlumo si Mommy sa sinabi ko kaya mas natakot ako sa posibleng isagot niya
“Your Dad is just looking for somebody else to blame. It’s not your fault, my dearest, Nathaniel.”
I froze in shock. So, it’s true. My brother is dead.
“Gaano na po siya katagal na wala?”
Mom’s eyes swelled with tears. “A month before their baby was born. He had everything planned for them.”
I clenched my fist. Truth be told, masakit pa rin palang balikan ang nakaraan. This isn't what I wished to happen.
“Did. . . Why did he die?”
Before my Mom could even start telling me what happened, she started to sob. Kahit na gusto kong malaman kung ano ang nangyari sa kapatid ko, ayaw ko namang makitang umiiyak si Mommy.
“You don’t have to tell me, Mom. Sorry for asking.”
“I’m sorry, Nathaniel. I’m not ready to discuss anything related to your brother. Just know that I am not blaming you for it.”
Hindi na niya dinagdagan ang sinabi niya at umalis. I was left alone, staring into nothing as I process our conversation. I spent quite some time looking back about everything.
I heard the door opened and thought that Mom might have came back, but I was wrong. Pumasok si Celeste at sinilip ako. “Can I come in?” tanong niya.
Bumuntonghininga lang ako bilang sagot at nag-iwas ng tingin. She might’ve interpreted it as a yes and just came in. Umupo siya sa tabi ko, I didn’t say a single word.
She slowly talked. “Okay ka lang?” Hindi pa rin ako nagsalita. “I know you’re mad at me, hindi ko naman na itatanggi ang pagkakamali ko. I’m just worried about you.”
“Why do you care? Umalis ka na lang, Celeste!”
“Is. . . Is it true na may fiancee ka na?”
“Oo, at wala ka nang kinalaman pa roon.”
“Alam mo ba, gusto sana ni Konrad makipag-ayos sa ’yo noon. Ilang beses na rin niyang nasabi na gusto ka niyang makita ulit para makipag-ayos sana—”
“I don’t care!” But she did not stop.
“Sising-sisi siya sa nangyari. He always got drunk and would go home late at night trying to find you. Nag-away kami noong gabing umalis siya dahil hinahanap ka na naman niya. Because of his concussion, nadisgrasya ang kapatid mo—”
“Shut up, Celeste! Wala akong pakialam!”
Mabilis akong tumayo at umalis. I heard her walking behind me, even begging me to stay. Hindi ko sila pinansin at nagmadaling umalis sa bahay.
I went back to the hospital as fast as I could. I found Amy sleeping. Umupo ulit ako sa tabi niya at inabot ang kamay niya.
She was weak so she had to stay here. Hindi ko na alam kung ano ang gagawin ko kapag nagtagal pa siya. Obviously, my family won’t help. Dad made that clear.
Hindi ko alam kung saan pa ako kukuha ng pera para mabuhay kaming dalawa. I had to look for work as soon as possible. With hopelessness, I shook my head as I kissed her hand.
Nagising yata siya sa ginawa ko kaya siya nagsalita. “Oh, nandito ka na pala. Kanina ka pa?”
Umiling ako. “Kararating ko lang. How are you feeling?”
She smiled. “Malakas na ako. Puwede na nga akong lumabas, eh.”
Alam kong sinabi niya ’yon dahil alam niyang nahihirapan na ako. Tumayo ako para halikan ang noo niya. “Pagaling ka. I’ll find a way to make things better.”
“Saan ka pala galing?”
“Diyan lang.”
Her brows furrowed. “Saan nga?”
“Bahay. I met my parents,” I answered, almost whispering.
“Oh, kumusta sila? Nagkaayos na ba kayo?”
I can feel my heart getting heavier as I recall what had happened. Siguro ay napansin din iyon ni Amy kaya hinaplos niya ang mukha ko.
“Kung hindi kayo nagkaayos, okay lang. May other time for that.”
I just smiled as I took a deep breath. “Yeah.”
Hindi ko alam kung dapat bang sabihin ko pa sa kaniya ang nalaman ko. I mean, wala naman siyang kinalaman sa mga nangyari. Siguro ay mas mabibigyan lang siya ng problema kung sakaling sabihin ko pa.
Noong gabing iyon, habang nagpapahinga si Amy, nakatulala lang ako sa dilim. Siguro nga, nagpabaya ako at hinayaang ang galit ko ang kumontrol sa akin. Hindi ko naman ginustong mapahamak ang kapatid ko.
I know what Celeste is trying to say. . . That I caused Konrad’s concussion and that’s why he died. Alam kong iyon din ang nasa isip ni Dad kaya ako ang sinisisi niya.
But as much as I hated Konrad and resented him for what he did, he is my brother. Hindi ko gugustuhing mapahamak siya lalo pa ang mamatay. May pamilya siya. I lost my brother. Celeste lost him as well. My parents lost their son. . . But a child wasn't able to meet his father, all because I let my anger took over me.
BINABASA MO ANG
Heartless Vasiliev
General FictionDiscovering the affair between his girlfriend and brother, Nathaniel was left devastated. In the midst of healing himself, he found a woman that loved him beyond his flaws. He left everything that once mattered to him in exchange for a life with her...
