Babymama

26.

Onika Maraj

I held the positive pregnancy test in my hand, I wanted to scream or throw shit, I don't know. I just knew right now wasn't the right time to have another baby.

I didn't know how to tell Beyonce, but Mrs. White did say we needed to communicate.

My house is finally done, and I'm currently unpacking my things. Beyoncé is on her way over to help me move the heavy items. I hired some help, but she insisted on lending a hand too.

I wasn't keeping the baby, I just didn't know how she would feel about it. At the end of the day it's my choice.

A few moments later, Beyonce arrived, handed me some food, and kissed me on the lips. We were in a great place, and I hope that after I tell her, we can stay that way.

"Looks like something's on your mind," as she went over to the boxes and started taking stuff out.

"Because there is," I said, taking the test out of my pocket and walking over to her. She dropped whatever was in her hands, looked at the test, then at me, and back at the test

"You're pregnant?" Duh.

"Yes, i'm pregnant"

I couldn't really read her facial expression, so I had no idea what was going through her mind at that moment

"say something" I encouraged.

"It's not a good time right now Nic"

"You're right, I wanted to discuss the possibility of an abortion," I said, nervously playing with my fingers. I wasn't sure how she felt about the subject.

"If that's what you want to do, I'll support you. If you decide to keep the baby, I'll be here for you too."

Wow, who is this woman? I love her so much.

"I don't want to keep the baby. We're not ready for another baby right now, maybe later"

"Well until then, feed my baby before he or she go back to heaven" I threw the pregnancy test at her laughing, she's so damn stupid.

"I know you didn't throw this pissy stick at me?"

I shook my head as I continued unpacking my things. I picked up a picture of me and Beyonce from College, we were so cute. I was amazed at how far we've came.

I felt her approach from behind, wrapping her arms around me and kissing my neck. 'You'll always be my baby,' she whispered. I smiled at her words as she walked away to unpack the kitchen items.

"Beyoncé?" I asked nervously, feeling anxious about bringing up the idea of the kids staying with me sometimes.

"Yeah?"

"Will you.. um, can the..." I couldn't get it out.

"What's up, baby?" she finally turned around giving me her full attention.

"Will you let the children come over? They don't have to spend the night, but I would love to spend time with them alone sometimes. It's okay if-" I started rambling.