FRIENDS - JIKOOK

00.18

mature - mention of ED

"Say ahhh"

Jimin scooted back from the blonde who was trying to forcibly feed him pizza.

"Kook, I'm full. Please get it away from me", Jimin begged, uncomfortable with the situation.

Jimin had eaten about half of his pizza and that was more than enough for him. He wasn't in the mood to choke down grease that goes against his diet. He was not about to lose his progress when he's come so far. A few months ago, he felt himself gaining an unhealthy amount of fat, which is why he hardened his workouts.

He will not resort back to the chubby kid that everyone made fun of, even his own parents. He will not be placed back in that dark headspace he was in when he was younger.

"Open up~", Jungkook sang, shoving the pizza slice closer to his friend, who already resembled a stunned cat.

"Jungkook stop it. I'm not hungry"

"Just take one more bite—"

"I said no! You're pissing me off!", Jimin snapped, getting fed up with the boy pushing his boundary. "Just this once, respect my decision", he pleaded, not wanting to come off too harsh but his friend was indeed making him upset.

Situations like this give Jimin anxiety, where he can feel himself shake. It makes him extremely uneasy and nauseous when he's being forced to do something he's not comfortable with, especially when it comes to food. As said before, he can't have himself resort back to the way he was before.

He hates himself for even eating the pizza in general. He could feel himself getting self-conscious for even eating a quarter of the slice. Sure, it's delicious and the old him would definitely finish a box by himself, but he's not the same. He still has the same desires but not the same mindset.

"I'm sorry", Jungkook muttered, placing the uneaten pizza slice back in the box. "I know what you're doing. I take notice of your habits. You didn't have breakfast, nor lunch and now dinner. You haven't even had a snack. You're reverting back to unhealthy habits"

Jimin said nothing in response, knowing there's nothing he can counter with. It's true, he is reverting back to his previous habits that helped him lose weight in the first place. Jungkook has helped him eat at a better level, one that's less life threatening, but he can feel himself getting bigger. His arms feel and look thicker than they were and it wasn't from muscle.

It's terrifying for Jimin to gain weight again. Nobody can expect him to eat the way he used to, he can't. He won't allow it.

"Listen to me, you are fine the way you are", Jungkook started, staring his best friend in the eyes. "Even when you were 'chubby' you were still fine. Fuck what everyone else told you, they clearly needed bi-focal lenses"

Jimin chuckled at the last sentence, remembering the not-so-subtle insults Jungkook used to make towards his bullies in high school, including his parents. Some of which they never fully caught on to at the dinner table. It used to make Jimin double over from laughter at the time.

"I saw you and I thought you were perfect and my opinion hasn't changed", Jungkook added, not breaking eye contact to show his sincerity.

Jimin felt his face redden at the simple compliment that was uttered so casually from his best friend's mouth. It made him recall what he was told that night in his room when he allowed Jungkook to see and touch him naked. He's never been that intimate with someone and just thinking about it made his heart ache.

"I'm just worried for you"

Jimin lowered his gaze to his hands as he nervously fiddled with his fingers. He hates to scare his best friend the same way he did months before. The last thing he wants is for Jungkook to worry about him losing himself again.

"I guess... I guess I c-can have a-another slice...", Jimin's voice wavered.

This boundary of his was one he was not ready to have broken, but if this was what needed to be done for Jungkook to have a peace of mind then he's willing to make a sacrifice.

Jungkook was aware of what Jimin was doing for him and wouldn't want him to do anything he's too unsettled with, so he's not going to force him to have an additional slice of pizza. He does want him to at least finish the one he started to eat - baby steps.

"Hyung, it's okay, you don't have to eat the other slice. But can you try to finish the one you were eating before? Just the rest of the half slice, please", Jungkook asked softly, making sure to take things slow so Jimin doesn't have an anxiety attack.

Jimin hesitantly picked up the pizza slice with his hand visibly shaking more than he expected. He did as he was requested to do, taking big bites of his half-eaten pizza slice, choking the rest down.

Jungkook gave him a proud smile and patted his head reassuringly.

"Don't worry, I promise that tomorrow we'll wake up at the crack ass of dawn to workout again, okay?"

Jimin nodded, not mentally present as his vision distorts, while his breathing becoming unstable. The air tightened around him, making him feel dizzy. His anxiety was getting the best of him as he could already feel himself slipping into the person he was before. The version of himself that he hated the most.

chapter eighteen - published: 07 - 05 - 2024

SYNCLES - Poor Jimin :( Also, THANK YOU FOR 1K VIEWS! Please vote and comment. Thank you for reading!