Starlight

-28-

Asher____

"Baby, please. I can't let you be all by yourself. I'll stay back, you know." I clung unto my girlfriend's arm, practically begging at this point. I was invited to a house party by Jasper. Rose has been feeling a little reluctant to accompany me on this one.

"Asher, you don't have to stay back. I'm not a baby or a little girl. I'm capable of taking care of myself. I love you, go have fun!" She rubbed her palm over my hand on her arm, slowly loosening my grip on her.

"I just want you there, please." She goes quiet for a second, I thought she was reconsidering the whole thing. How wrong was I. The look she had on her face crushed my hope.
I just want her there with me. I just want to spend the evening with her. Could have ditched the party but I already gave my word to the guys. I couldn't just back out now, could I?

"Your friends don't seem to take a liking to me. From their actions, it's quite clear that I'm hated and not accepted. Will never be. It's better I stay home." She took steps back creating a huge space between us. One, I don't quite like.
"Is that why you're so reluctant?" It all makes sense now.

"Don't you see? Anthony finds a fault in whatever I do, is it my speech? My actions? He despises me. Jasper glares at me like I'm some ugly looking wild beast. What have I done?" She whispered her words with quivering lips. This is not the first time she has cried over this same issue.

"I don't care about their thoughts, you're mine. The woman I love and that's all that matters. I accept you as you are, so does Dean and Britney." I try to reassure her, a way of making her reconsider her previous decision.

"I thought I could ignore them but their sneaky comments and intensive glares gets me every time. They would rather prefer you be with a white girl or more likely, a mixed breed like you than a black girl. It's obvious. Their body language speaks a lot. Forgotten I'm quite observant?"

She walked closer to her bed, falling back on it.
"I rather stay home. Their comments are quite disturbing. I prefer my sanity, you know." We chuckled at the last part. Her switch of emotions, something I find quite amusing.

My feet took me closer to her, I sat beside her on the bed. Watching her small figure lay on the bed with her arms spread widely across the bed.

"I prefer you to any other girl out there. To me, you're the most gorgeous girl I've had the privilege to lay my eyes on. The pretty girl I want to spend my life with. The one that's gonna be the mother of my beautiful kids. I see the girl who push me closer to God. Why won't I choose you over all others?"

I coaxed her carressing her wrist. I can feel her eyes on me. I look up to her eyes, she searched mine for what I think, sincerity, honestly. I'm being genuine, babe. I always am. Her eyes softened, had her lips pressed together. I reach forward to her face, caressing her beautiful face.

"I love you, Rose."
"I love you too, baby. You won't leave my sight?"
"I won't."

****

... But I did. I left her on her own to go play a video game and then I came back, my girl was no way to be seen. That night, I went home with a crying girlfriend. She wouldn't open up to me. From that night, I lost a part of my girl. I caught her staring at nothing countless times but she won't speak up. I knew something was bothering her but never did it cross my mind that she was raped.

Never.

Last night, when I told Rose I read Before her doom. I watched the colour drain out of her face. She occasionally kept glances around like someone was there....watching us.
She's scared, I know.
She's traumatized, I know.

But I want to help her. How can I help her when I can't even identify the root of the issue? I don't even know where to start from.
Not even a clue or a hint. Nothing.
I can't seek answers from nothing, can I?

She had a panic attack last night.
Shaking my head at the thought of last night, I go over to the reading table across my bed. I had a bookmark on that page.

Peter glared at my crying figure whilst putting back on his clothes, picking up mine and throwing them over to me. My disheveled clothes landed just beside me.
"You have always been a whore, I'm glad I got to get a taste but I'm disgusted." He spat the words in my face. I was disgusted with myself. How could I have let this happen?

'You weren't conscious when this happened,' my subconsciousness reminded me.
I know but will Reign understand? I can't even look at him in the eyes now. I screamed for help yet no one came to my rescue.
I didn't cheat, I was raped.
Will Reign listen to me?

Then I took a decision as I got a hold of my clothes, putting them on, I won't tell him until need be.
I can't loose him.
God, will he ever forgive me if he happens to hear of this?
Debatable.

The night she was raped. How could he do this? Did he want to see my world crumble to the grounds? Did he want me to be a shell of myself?
Now he succeeded with his devious plans, is he happy to ruin someone's life? Does he ever look back and regret his actions?
I know him to well to guess that answer.
No, he never did.

I find myself flipping the pages to the one I vividly remember each and every word. The one that hunts my sleep and my thoughts.

Page 187.

I wept staring at the picture of my now ex boyfriend, the thought of that night hunts my very bane of existence. If he had not left my side like he had promised earlier that night, tainting my dignity won't have even been a thought to Peter. A very close friend of Reign. One, he least expect would be the father of my baby.
Peter Madison.

That happened to be three months after I walked out on her. I clenched my fist at the words. How crude of a person. When it dawned on me who the father of Elle was, all I felt was my anger boiling up inside of me. I wanted to march to his front porch and punch his face, repeatedly till he was barely recognised.

Then I remembered the scriptures, don't let your anger get the best of you. Never let it control you.
Else, I think I might be in prison by now.

If he had not left my side like he had promised earlier that night....

Those words kept repeating in my head. Not as much as what Peter Madison did. Someone I very well knew his real name. Indeed, it's the person I least expected.

Peter Madison.

###
Can you guess who Peter Madison is?
Jasper or Anthony?