Incision | Rilaya

seventeen ☼

Girl Meets Repeating History

[ R i l e y ]

"I - uhm... Are you okay?" Maya: placed her hand on my shoulder, trying to calm me down, but I shook her hand away.

"Did you know?" I sniffled, more tears spilled out of my eyes in the process.

"Riley, I -" she started, but I cut her off.

"Did. You. Know?"

"Y-yeah" she looked at me with a strange, unreadable expression on her face, fear was screaming from her watery eyes.

Maybe she hid this from me on purpose.

"Maya..." I leaned forward and wrapped myself in her embrace. She held me closer, and I cried into her shoulder.

They were alive.

Both of them.

They were somewhere out there, and I was going to find them.

~

"We're sneaking out to find them tonight" I started, holding up the book, "This book says they're in Chicago, so that's where we're going."

"A-are you sure about this? I mean, all the way in Chicago..." Maya trailed off, mumbling some other things under her breath.

"Yeah, do you not want to find them?"

"I-it's just that..." Maya looked down, avoiding eye contact with me, "I like things how they are, and we get to see each other every single da-"

I cut her off, "And keep our relationship from everyone? I don't want this Maya"

"Things are fine how it is, you can't. fix. everything." Maya usually says it like the many other times she's said it, but this time, she was serious, like she actually meant it.

"Maya, are you mad?" I softened my tone a bit.

"No, no I'm not mad! I'm not mad at all that Lucas blackmailed me to go out with him, I'm not mad at the people at school who beat you up everyday, and I-I'm not mad a-at you!" she stammered, before running out of the room with tears filling her eyes.

I wanted to go after her, but that would not be of any use. She was already mad at me, and I can't fix this. I can't fix everything.

Maya's words repeated in my mind like an echo.

The thing she said about Lucas hurt. Was she going out with Lucas behind my back? Maybe that's why she kept ditching me.

It's okay, I don't need her to look for my own mother and my own brother.

I'll just go myself, with or without Maya.

~

As night fell, I got everything I needed, even though I was not at all sure how to get to Chicago.

It was dark, and silent, and a sense of eeriness was creeping up on me.

I might regret doing this, but like Maya used to say "I want to look back and regret the things that I did do"

If only she agreed to come with me, maybe I would be less scared. Because wherever she is, I'm home.

I tiptoed up to her door, pulled the handle, and slowly pushed the creaking door open.

I saw Maya laying there on the floor, holding her box against her chest.

"Maya..."

I scurried over to her, and gently picked up her wrist, I traced my fingers over her scars, and got blood stains on my hand.

I mean, a lot of blood.

I dropped everything and ran to Cory and Katy's room. I banged on the door, screaming and crying.

Cory finally opened it, "What's wrong?"

"MAYA! SHE CUT HERSELF AGAIN" I screamed louder, waterfalls of tears streamed down my face.

I sat on the floor, sobbing as Cory and Katy picked Maya up, and brought her to the hospital.

🔺

PLS DONT HATE ME. I'm really sorry

anyways I made a new cover for the book, it was originally supposed to be an Instagram edit, but since it looks okay, why not make it a cover as well??

oh right follow my other account- ryctumblr IM ALMOST AT 600! so it would mean a lot if you just hit that follow button ;D

I'm making this book 24 chapters btw, and ik it's not a good number to end the book at, but you'll see

any who, thank you so much for all the support, and comments, it means a lot to me <3

- xoxo,
Rowan ♡