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* NO PROMPT *
≪•◦ ❈ ◦•≫
First had handed him the brown leather bound book with a soft smile and walked away without saying anything. Khao looked after him, looking to the book in his hand and back, feeling confused. What had First given him? Why had he given it to him?
—
That night as he sat on the couch, the TV playing something in the background, Khao opened the book and saw a sticky note pressed against the pages. "Enjoy the read" was all that First had written.
Turning the page, he began to read.
❝❞
His eye shine when he looks at me, I've realized. Is this the beginning of falling in love, or am I just delusional? Maybe a year ago, I would've said I was just delusional, but now? I truly don't know. Maybe it is love and maybe it's delusion.
❝❞
Khao is realizing now that this isn't a book at all. It's a journal that First has kept, and he's given it to him to read. The second thing he realizes, is that he doesn't one hundred percent know who the 'he' that's being written about is.
❝❞
I think he's more beautiful today than he was yesterday. How is that possible? How can a human being be so beautiful? It's as if he glows. Aside from his beauty is his heart, though. He's got a beautiful heart, too. For his friends. For his family. For his cats. I take back what I said about being delusional, this is the beginning of love— I truly believe it.
❝❞
❝❞
My heart thinks of nothing but him these days, it seems. I think if my heart could talk, it would simply say his name over and over again. Khao. Khao. Khao. Khao. Am I being ridiculous? Is this what falling love actually feels like?
❝❞
When he reads his own name, Khao's heart stops. It's him. First is writing... about him.
❝❞
He knows me so well. I never thought another human being could know my heart so well, but somehow he does. Something else, I don't feel like I'm 'waiting' anymore. Does that even make sense? This is the beginning of falling in love.
❝❞
Khao reads on and on, through the pages that detail First's descent into love. As he reads on, his smile only grows wider and wider.
Then the entries start to change, and they start addressing him directly.
❝❞
My heart will hold you. Even if my arms can't hold you anymore, Khao, always know that my heart will hold you. I adore you, Khaotung. I absolutely adore you with my entire heart and soul. Never forget this.
❝❞
❝❞
I'm realizing that I love you the way that I love no one else. There is no question now that I've fallen in love. There is also no more 'falling' in love anymore. I couldn't stop even if I wanted to. Hey, did you know that I'm proud of you? I'm sure you did, but just in case here it is in writing: I'm proud of you, Khao. You are going to do so many great things and I hope that I am by your side as you do them. You and me forever, okay Khao?
❝❞
"Forever." Khao murmurs to himself as he brushes his finger over the writing, turning the page. There aren't many pages left now. Khao is both eager and not to reach the end of the words that First has written to him. When he checks the time, he realizes that it's already been almost two more hours that he's been reading.
❝❞
I think it's getting close to the time that I should tell you, Khao. I'm a little nervous— but we don't have to worry about that right now. I watched you today. When you were looking in the mirror. You were probably pointing out all the things you don't like about yourself but I was smiling as I went over all of the things I love about you. I could make a list, but that would take pages and pages. How did we get here, Khao? I'm so in love with you. I think about you as I fall asleep at night, hoping that you're comfortable and cosy, that you're happy... Hey, are you still okay with forever? I am."
❝❞
❝❞
The last entry has come, Khao and I'm going to flip a coin. Heads: This is yours (sooner, at least). I give you the journal and let you read it. If the coin lands on tails: This journal is mine for just a little bit longer.
Heads. A few final words for you, my sweet Khao. Always remember that I love you. Always remember that I'm in this for forever. That I would do anything for you. I hope you always think of me first when something troubles you. Most of all, Khao I hope you always know and remember that I love you. That I'll always be your First.
❝❞
Khao closes the journal, looking up to find Montow watching him. Quickly, Khao jumps up from his seat, barely remembering to grab his phone as he beelines for the front door, pulling his keys off of the book by his front door. As he runs out the door, he thinks he hears a thud from something being knocked over, but he doesn't have the time to pick it up. He'll deal with it later.
Khao almost runs over a trash can as he speeds from his house, hoping that he's not too late to talk to First. The clock on the dashboard tells him that it's 10:18 PM, and he thinks that he should be fine.
His heart is slamming against his chest as drives down the road. He feels like he can barely catch his breath. The nerves of what he's doing are catching up to him, but he doesn't care too much.
≪•◦ ❈ ◦•≫
Khao bangs on First's front door. The lights were still on which was a good sign, Khao thought.
When the front door opens and Khao sees First, he briefly thinks about turning right back around and running in the opposite direction. Instead, he looks at First and says, "Let's flip a coin. Heads: I'm yours. Tails: you're mine." And before First can even respond, Khao pulls him close and kisses him.
"Well hello to you too," First mumbles with a smile as he pulls back, pressing his head to Khao's. "Don't 'hello' me after all that," Khao teases, pushing the front of First's shoulder. First smiles at him, pulling him inside and closing the door behind them. He draws a hand across Khao's cheek softly, letting his touch linger. "Should I say 'I love you' then?" First asks, lifting Khao's chin. Khao smiles at him. "No." He says. "I should say that. I love you, First. Forever." First smiles at him again. "Sweet Khao," he murmurs, leaning forward and kissing him again softly.
